


What the Water Gave Me

by thecrownofclowns



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, M/M, Sailor AU, mermaid au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-30
Updated: 2014-08-30
Packaged: 2018-02-15 10:08:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 40,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2225055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecrownofclowns/pseuds/thecrownofclowns
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kris always knew that he belonged to the sea and it happens that Yixing is the sea. mermaid au</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Flood

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I obviously own nothing but the plot. Title taken from the song "What the Water Gave Me" by Florence + the Machines which is very fitting I feel.

Kris knew that he belonged to the sea. She was the only thing that captivated him. He could feel the call deep in his bones. He didn’t belong on land, walking around on hard packed earth that stood solid under his feet. He didn’t belong on cargo docks or in stores. He belonged out on the ocean, with the sea rolling beneath him, rocking his joints together and the harsh wind chilling his bones. The sea called to him and Kris felt compelled to answer.

It was deep in his blood after all. The Wu’s had been sailors for nearly a hundred years, since they had immigrated to Southern China back in the early eighteenth century. Every generation gave rise to another member meant for a life at sea. Kris remembered his father telling him tales about his voyages. He used to tell Kris all about the sea and how kind she could be.

But he also told Kris about how cruel she could be. The sea deserved the respect of men, and she delivered a harsh hand when she wasn’t granted that respect. Kris’s father told him about ships lost to rocky waters or storms that overturned the biggest ships. Even worse, Kris’s father told him about the monsters that lurked beneath the calm surface of the water. He told him about creatures with slimy hands and sharp teeth. Demons that would devour any man unfortunate enough to fall overboard. Kris used to run away screaming when his father told him these stories. But they taught him how to respect the ocean, and Kris made it his job to do so.

Kris believed that he belonged to the sea. She controlled him like a marionette, calling for him to come. And come he always would. He was the most loyal servant, and he believed that she granted him safe passage because of his loyalty. Kris gave himself to the sea, much like one would to a creator. His soul had come from the sea and it would eventually return to her.  He didn’t belong on land. The sea was his home, and it would be for his entire life.

This is the story of Kris’s journey back home.

 

**Flood**

The first time Kris was accepted as a member of a crew, he was seventeen and already bigger and taller than some of the men onboard. He was lucky to get a spot. The ship was an English ship that had stopped in Hong Kong for supplies. A lot of the crew were Chinese and he got one of them to talk the English captain into letting him join. Kris agreed to take any job necessary so long as he would get the chance to be on board. It had been almost ten years since Kris had been on a ship and he was eager to get back aboard one.

Kris used to go to sea with his father, years ago before his father left home. His father would teach him how to man the sails and tie the appropriate knots. His father taught him how to calculate the current and the tides. His father taught him all the essentials of being a sailor. He taught Kris about the duties of being a sailor. And also the sacrifices. His father taught him that one gave up their family and love and, often, their sanity. Being at sea took it’s toll on man, but Kris’s father had taught him that it was their price for safe voyage. The sea was a fair maiden.

Kris got the job of moving cargo. He was more than capable for the job. He was young with dark shaggy hair and muscles that coiled under the surface. His eyesight was good, and that made him very well adapt for working on the ship’s deck. Within the first few days, he got praise from the captain for his hard work. He bowed, merely showing his gratitude for the opportunity to board the ship.

But Kris laid down below deck every night unsatisfied. He felt the rock of the ship and it should have lulled him to sleep, but he couldn’t fall asleep. It was stuffy with all the crew members sleeping in one place. Kris couldn’t feel the sting of the wind coming off of the sea or hear the sound of the waves lapping against the hull of the boat. Kris couldn’t even fathom sleeping without those things. The sea was like his mother singing him a lullaby.

Kris decided that he’d always feel more comfortable above deck than below. The crew were all perplexed when they found Kris curled up with a blanket against the railing on the ship’s deck. They couldn’t begin to imagine why Kris would opt for sleeping on the deck instead of the warmth of the cabin. But not a single one of them could dispute the look of peace on the young giant’s face.

The ship’s route was long and the men were all expecting a lonely time. So the ship frequently stopped in ports so the men could go to taverns in search of cheap whores to bed for the night. Kris didn't care for that. He merely stayed on the ship, scrubbing floors and moving cargo, until the ship was ready to depart again.

But not even Kris was immune to wanting a human companion. Which was why he willingly accepted the gift of a whore from some of the other crew members. They thought he could use the distraction, especially after hearing that Kris's innocence was still in tact. So they dragged him off the boat and took him to a tavern. Kris got his pick from all the present prostitutes. His eyes fell upon a tall young man with sharp angles and dark hair. The men raised eyebrows at Kris's choice but paid for the whore nonetheless.

Kris lost his virginity to a man named Tao who was not as mature as he seemed. For a prostitute, he laughed a lot. He laughed at Kris's blushes and averted gazes. He laughed when he stripped of Kris's trousers to see the gift beneath. He chuckled when he straddled Kris and slipped himself down onto Kris's cock.

Kris’s first sexual experience felt good, but it wasn’t perfect. The other crew members had told him that there would be no feeling like sex. They promised that it would be the greatest magic in the world and that he’d never be able to live without it. Kris was expecting the experience to be like watching the sun glisten off of the open sea at dawn or like the burn of salt water in his throat from spray during a storm. Kris was imagining the gentle, endless ebb and flow of water. He imagined that the roll of Tao's hips were going to mimic the rock of smooth waves.

Kris found that Tao was nothing like the sea. His skin was hot and solid beneath Kris’s hands like hard packed earth. Kris knew even before he reached his orgasm that it would be sufficient but not fulfilling. He imagined his orgasm to be like a large wave breaking upon the shore. It was satisfying but it lacked the intensity that he was hoping for. Kris didn’t think it was Tao, who giggled again when Kris emptied inside of him. Kris believed that the problem was that he was promised magic, but the only magical thing to him was the sea.

Tao curled onto his side once Kris pulled out of him and began putting on his clothes. Kris was handsome but Tao was a whore, had been for years. He could tell when someone wasn’t entirely invested in the occurrence. He wondered vaguely if Kris had interests in someone else or if Kris had never wanted this meeting at all. He supposed it didn’t really matter. Kris would leave for sea in the morning and possibly never see Tao again.

“Come back and see me if you ever want to do this again,” Tao said as Kris placed the rolled up money on the night stand. Kris nodded without looking at Tao, making his way towards the door. “And Kris?” Kris stopped and glanced at Tao. “Whatever it is that you’re looking for in a lover, you’ll find it eventually.” Kris nodded again and walked out of the room.

What he was looking for in a lover was the same thing he looked for in the sea. Tranquility. Fairness. Generosity. Strength. Magic. Mystery. He wanted someone who could captivate him and make him feel like he was drowning under the pressure of relentless waves. He wanted to put his hands on a body that formed to his touch. He wanted someone who would surround him completely and chill him to the bone. Kris wished he could take the sea and make them into a person, because that person would be his soulmate.

But you couldn’t capture the sea in the human form. It was impossible. It would be too perfect.

 

Kris was about to learn that perfection did, in fact, exist.

 

After nine months aboard the ship and the start of his second voyage, Kris experienced his first heavy storm at sea. He'd been through smaller ones with his father, where the rain didn't sting skin and the waves merely rocked the boat. The storm that Kris experienced that day blinded his vision, made him unsteady on his feet, and sent the crew into a panic. Everyone was shouting, the captain louder than most, to secure the crates and cargo and to maintain the sails. They all knew that the ship would overturn if they lost their sails.

Kris, as one of the larger and strongest crew members, was tasked with securing the sails which are flailing around in the wind. He could hardly see, the heavy downpour flooding his eyes, and his feet gained no traction on the soaked deck. It was a daunting task. The ropes were tearing at the skin on his hands and his arms and back were screaming for rest from the strain of trying to tie the sails to the mast. Kris also felt pressure to do his job right, tie the tightest knots, and succeed. If he failed, the ship would be in major trouble.

People started shouting and Kris turned his head to see several men pulling at a net that was thrown over the ship's side. Before the storm had started, they had casted a net to see if they could catch some fish to cook. The sea was threatening to tear the net away and, as the only one they had, the crew couldn't afford to lose it. So several men were haphazardly trying to salvage the net from the water's hold.

A loud crack brought Kris's attention back to his job. One of his knots broke and the tie for the sail was whipping around in the harsh wind. Kris tried to take hold of it and retie it down but the wind was too fierce. So Kris did the only thing he could think of. He looped the rope around his hand and arm, pressed himself against the mast, and pulled his arm against his chest. The rope bit painfully into his skin where he had it twisted around his arm. He could feel his skin beginning to peel, but he held on, using his stature and muscle like a human knot to keep the sail in place.

When the storm finally passed, Kris's arm was a bloody mess. He loosened the ropes and pulled them away to reveal deep lashes in his forearm and hand. He let out a small gasp of pain, and suddenly everyone was staring at him. Some looked at him like he was crazy and others looked at him like he was their saviour. One older deck hand approached him. He tore some fabric from his shirt, which was torn from the storm anyway, and began wrapping Kris's arm. When it was covered and the blood was soaked up, he pat Kris on the back.

"You are a crazy son of a bitch," the man told him before laughing. "But thank you for potentially saving our lives." Several other men thanked him as well. Kris smiled, happy that even though he couldn't do his job right, he got it done. He'd never admit that the incident made him feel appreciated.

A loud cry drew everyone's attention over to a small crowd of people by where the net was bundled up on the deck. One man was clutching his hand to his chest much like Kris had done, and it looked like he was bleeding. The men around Kris started making their way over and Kris was soon to follow, using his height to see over the heads of his crewman. He wasn't sure what he was expecting to see. Something caught in the net, he supposed. A fish or maybe something bigger.

He wasn't expecting something so beautiful.

Large, dark, terrified eyes jumped from side to side, trying to simultaneously watch every man in the growing crowd. They were scared, and Kris guessed that whoever these eyes belong to must be trying not to seem as scared as they were. But the fear was there regardless in the overwhelming diameter and depth that was displayed. A mouth opened in a hiss was the next thing Kris noticed. The teeth inside were sharp and pointed and Kris suspected that they were deadly. There was a tiny bit of blood around the lips, which looked deadly on their own for how soft they were. They were full though not overbearing for the small face they belonged to. Small hands pulled at the net twisted around the body. They couldn't seem to get free and Kris could tell that the ropes were painfully constricting in some areas.

Kris's eyes finally focused on the parts of the being before him that were very much not human. The ears were pointed at the tip and the shell wasn’t rounded like a human’s but rather wavy instead. The forearms had webbed, fin-like structures coming from the sides, and they shined ethereally where water had pooled on them. The bare chest (a clear sign that this being was in fact male) gave way, not to legs, but to a scaled tail. It had a metallic sheen to it and it ended in a fin that heavily suggested that this creature was a real life fairytale.

“What the hell is that?” one of the deckhands asked. The creature struggled with the ropes of the net. He wasn’t getting anywhere and he knew it. It was in the way that his eyes got bigger as he struggled. He was trapped and he was now at the mercy of the crew. Kris took a deep breath because he wasn’t sure what that meant for the terrified creature before him.

“It fucking bit me,” the man clutching his hand said. He held it out for everyone to see, and Kris had to admit that it looked painful and deep. A voice within him suggested that the man had no one to blame but himself for reaching out to a scared creature like he did.

“What do we do with it?”

“Somebody get the Captain. He’ll know what to do.”

“I bet he’d fetch a pretty penny back on shore.”

Voices were overlapping each other as they all shouted out their ideas. They grew so loud that nobody heard Kris’s suggestion. They didn’t realize the weight of the choice before them. The creature, whoever he was, had come from the sea. Kris knew that if he didn’t go back to where he came from, the sea would make them all pay.

“He has to go back,” Kris nearly shouted. Everyone turned to him. “We have to give him back to the sea, or she’ll make sure we pay for it.” The men all stared at him for several long seconds before one of them started to laugh. The rest quickly followed with their own laughter and Kris felt a white hot rage burn inside him. They were sailors. How could they disrespect the sea like that? “Listen to me, if we don’t return him--”

“What’s going on?” another voice cut Kris off. They all turned to see the captain walking towards them. He stopped a few feet away with wide, disbelieving eyes. He looked to the men and then back to the sea creature still struggling futilely with the net. “Well, I’ll be damned. One of the merfolk right here in these waters. I thought they were only a myth. No one’s ever found one before.” And just like that Kris could see the dollar signs in his eyes. “We’ll bring him back to shore and see if anyone would be willing to buy him. A treasure like this is sure to go for a good price.”

“Sir, that isn’t a good idea. He belongs to the sea and if--”

“Tie him up and put him in the cargo hold,” the captain said, once again cutting Kris off. The creature, a merman Kris deduced from the captain's broken Mandarin, started crying as he struggled, tears rushing down his face. Kris took one look at his face, beauty marred by the track of tears, before stepping up to the captain.

“You don’t want to do this. Betraying the sea like this is going to get us all killed. He belongs to the sea and she’s going to want him back.” The captain raised an eyebrow at Kris’s brazen remark, but he eventually waved his hand through the air.

“Don’t be so superstitious. He’ll make us enough money to quit work for a year.” The captain turned and walked away. The man who got bit stepped forward and showed the captain as he approached.

“It bit me, Sir.” The captain nodded.

“Make sure you gag him too, then.” Kris’s eyes widened in horror. He turned just in time to see two men take hold of the merman’s arms and another wrap his hands around the creature’s tail. It was still wrapped in the net which made it’s fight very unsuccessful. They got hold of him completely and his thrashing became merely a waste of energy. Kris stepped forward because they were being too harsh, too rough. If they harmed him, then the next storm that came their way would destroy them.

A hand on his arm stopped him from interfering. The man who stopped him was the same deck hand who had wrapped his injured hand earlier. Kris opened his mouth to protest but the man shook his head and gestured with his chin to where the captain was watching the scene with careful eyes.

“He’ll punish you if you disobey his order.” Kris clenched his jaw, but shook his head. He certainly couldn’t help the poor creature if he got himself locked up. Or worse, removed from the ship. And Kris was going to help. It was his duty as one of the sea’s most loyal followers. Kris would save him, no matter what.

 

He waited until the first shift ended. The captain had requested that one of the crew stand guard and watch the creature at all times. Kris wasn’t surprised that the captain hadn’t chosen him for watch. Lucky enough for him, the second man chosen for watch was, in fact, the same deck hand who had shown Kris nothing but kindness.

“You can’t let him go, but I’ll let you in there.” Kris nodded. The man was giving him a look that Kris couldn’t identify, but he stepped back and let Kris through regardless. Kris walked through the cargo hold, eyes straining in the dark to find him. He was towards the back by the open window, and he looked asleep when Kris first approached.

Those large, scared eyes snapped open when Kris approached. The creature let out a muffled cry and quickly moved to scoot away from Kris, wedging himself into the wall of the room, by using his feet to move himself. Kris’s eyebrows tugged down. Feet? He looked again and saw two perfectly human legs where the previous tail had been. He looked at the creature’s arms and ears and, sure enough, those were human too.

Kris walked quickly towards the man and kneeled down before him. He started crying again, harder this time, as Kris reached out to him. He turned his head away and squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to hold back his tears. His eyelids did him no use and neither did the gag to keep back his whines. Kris frowned as he reached behind the man to take hold of the makeshift gag’s knot. The man flinched at his touch.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he whispered. The man shook his head, and Kris quickly untied the rag keeping his mouth from closing. The man sucked in a huge breath of air, one that quivered under the force of his next sob.

“Please,” a soft voice pleaded. Kris’s eyes widened at the near flawless Mandarin that his ears picked up. “Please, please, please don’t hurt me.” The tears flowed heavily down the man’s cheeks and Kris took hold of his face between his large hands. The man cried harder, anticipating some obvious form of cruelty from Kris. Kris leaned forward and placed his lips to the tear stains streaking the man’s face. His eyes opened wide and he was so momentarily stunned that he stopped crying.

“I’m not going to hurt you. I promise.” Kris looked into the face of the hostage creature before him. He was beautiful, Kris noted. Those eyes and lips were truly dangerous with how they responded to Kris’s act of kindness. “I’m Kris. Can I know your name?” The man looked at him with wide eyes, but finally he lowered his eyes.

“Yixing,” he whispered in a voice so low that Kris barely heard it. Kris nodded, before reaching behind Yixing, a name Kris thought was beautiful, to untie the ropes around his wrists. Kris was nearly pressed against him and Yixing flinched at the contact. When Yixing’s hands were free, he brought them around to fist in the fabric of Kris’s shirt. Kris was taken aback by the gesture. “Help me, please. Help me, and I promise that you will be rewarded for it. The sea always repays kindness.”

Kris removed Yixing’s hands from his shirt and moved a few feet away from him. Yixing’s eyes widened in the obvious rejection and tears began to well in his eyes again. Kris looked back at Yixing’s nakedness with a frown. He looked around the room for anything that he could use to cover the man up. He found a dirty and tattered sheet covering some barrels. It was old and unfitting of someone so beautiful, but Kris believed it was better than leaving Yixing shivering and exposed.

Kris pulled it off of the barrels and kneeled once more before Yixing so he could wrap the man in the sheet. Yixing pulled it close around his body and snuggled into it’s warmth. Kris smiled because Yixing really was so cute, but he frowned once he noticed Yixing looking at him with suspicious eyes.

“I said I wouldn’t hurt you,” Kris whispered as he sat back and watched Yixing.

“Why are you doing this? Why aren’t you like the other men?” Kris straightened at that.

“Did they harm you?” Kris’s voice came out harsh and Yixing cowered away from it. Kris shook his head with anger. “They are sailors. They should know better than this. Yixing, I promise I will make them pay if they did anything to you.”

“Why?” Yixing asked again.

“Because I am a sailor and I respect the sea.”

“So you’re only being kind to me because you fear the sea’s retaliation?” Yixing asked as he pulled the sheet up closer around his face. Kris shook his head.

“I want to help you because no one deserves to be exploited for money.” At the word “help”, Yixing reemerged from the cocoon he’d made of the sheet. His eyes were wide and hopeful, and Kris had no doubts that he was doing the right thing. Kris reached out and brushed Yixing’s hair away from his forehead. His fingers brushed soft skin, and this time Yixing didn’t flinch away. “I am going to help you because I obey the sea, and she wants you back.”

Yixing reached out and grabbed Kris’s shoulders, fingers twisting in the fabric there. Kris noticed that Yixing’s hands were dainty, small palms and bony fingers, and they barely covered Kris’s shoulders at all. His grip was strong, however, and it sent a stinging pain through Kris’s shoulders. The clutch was desperate as if Yixing feared letting go of Kris would all but ensure that he never left this ship.

“I can’t--” Kris stopped because he feared that he was about to crush Yixing’s hope as well as destroy Yixing’s faith in him. “I can’t help you yet. Not tonight.” Yixing’s eyes went wide once more and he snatched his hands back. Kris immediately felt a shiver run through him that had little to do with the freezing temperatures in the cargo hold. “I can’t help you until we anchor. Because the ship is in motion, there are crew members all over that deck. If I tried to help you now, we wouldn’t make it past the door. They’d tie me up too, or worse, and then it would all be over.”

Yixing buried his face once more in the sheet. Kris tried to think of something to reassure him, to let him know that Kris would do everything in his power to make sure that Yixing returned home unharmed. Nothing he thought of did his chivalry any justice though. Yixing wouldn’t believe in him until he did something to prove himself worthy of that trust.

Kris slipped his shirt over his head and handed it to Yixing. Yixing refused to look up at Kris, so Kris reached forward and tugged the sheet back slightly. Yixing looked at him with teary eyes, and Kris felt his heart break a little. Kris offered his shirt once more to Yixing. Yixing reached out and took it before slipping the fabric over his head. He seemed to struggle a bit and Kris just laughed. Yixing finally maneuvered his arms through the holes and pulled the shirt down. It still left him greatly exposed, but it made Kris feel better to know that Yixing had some sort of clothing.

“Yixing, can I ask why you aren’t like before?” Yixing still looked forlornly sad, but he nodded.

“It’s because I’ve been out of the water for too long. We change into this form as a means of camouflage in case something happens and we end up on land.” Kris nodded but a frown settled onto his face. Yixing looked human because it was his natural, or in this case supernatural, defense mechanism from preventing exactly what was happening to him now.

“Yixing, please listen to me.” Yixing looked at him with the same hopeless expression he’d had before. Kris shook his head. “I can’t do it yet, but I swear on my life that I will get you off of this ship. As soon as the time’s right, I’ll get you back home. I won’t let them hurt you.”

Kris stood up quickly before turning around to leave. He wasn’t supposed to stay long. He had to leave before someone noticed he was missing or came to switch shifts with his friend. Kris only took one step towards the door before a hand circled his wrist. Kris stilled and looked over his shoulder. Yixing had the sheet tangled around his legs and he was stretched out to reach Kris. Kris felt a blush creep onto his face because Yixing’s warm, soft skin was pressed against his and it was causing his heart to race.

“Why should I trust you? What are you trying to gain?”

“I have to want something?”

“You’re a human. You all want something.” Kris looked from Yixing’s face to where Yixing’s fingers were pressed to his wrist. Kris gently pulled his wrist from Yixing’s grasp. Yixing still looked at him, waiting for an answer. Kris had thought he’d told Yixing why he was doing this, but he realized that his reason seemed odd to someone who didn’t understand Kris’s devotion to the sea.

“I do want something,” Kris admitted. Yixing’s eyes narrowed. Kris’s lips quirked up on the sides. “I want you to be safe and back home where you belong. You said it yourself, ‘the sea repays kindness.’” Yixing’s mouth opened, but Kris walked out of the room before Yixing could say anything.

 

Kris kept his eyes on the entrance to the cargo where they were holding Yixing. Every time he was on deck, he made sure no one went close to it. He took note of everyone assigned to guard the door. His frown was monumental when he realized that the man Yixing had bitten was one of the chosen guards. His hand was wrapped but it still occasionally bled through the cloth. Kris couldn’t help the feeling that he was the man that Kris should pay the most attention to.

Kris tried to see Yixing whenever he could, but he was sorely limited to only going at night. The men would notice if he was missing during the day, and his friend was on guard only at night. The men already knew that Kris enjoyed sleeping on deck, so his absence in the cabin at night went unnoticed. Kris would rest under his blanket along the ship’s railing until he saw his friend move to stand in front of the cargo hold door. Then he’d get up and sneak inside to visit Yixing.

He’d always find Yixing curled into a ball in the darkest corner, hidden away from the light of the window. It’s safer to be hidden away, he told Kris when Kris asked him why he didn’t sit near the window. Kris also saved a portion of his food from the day to give to Yixing. Despite the fact that the captain intended to sell Yixing for profit, he cared very little for Yixing’s well being, and he never provided food for him. So Kris always gave Yixing the portion of his food that he’d saved. Yixing liked fish, a fact Kris could easily have guessed, but he also liked cheese and rice. Kris watched him devour the food hungrily with a smile. Kris really wanted to bring Yixing some clothes to wear but if anyone saw him with the clothes, they’d know that someone was visiting him. Kris couldn’t risk that, so he had to settle for warming up Yixing’s arms with his hands whenever the other man got shivers.

“I miss home,” Yixing said. Tears were starting to pool in his eyes, and Kris felt his heart skip involuntarily. Kris didn’t want Yixing to start crying. He’d finally made it to the point where he didn’t cry every second he could. Kris didn’t want to see Yixing back to that point. So Kris reached out and smoothed back Yixing’s hair in a comforting gesture. Yixing leaned forward into Kris’s hand, and Kris’s heart skipped another beat.

“Don’t cry,” Kris whispered. “I’ll get you home and then you’ll have nothing to miss.” Yixing closed his eyes and tried to cheer himself up. Kris ruffled his hair, and Yixing looked up at him in a pout, that bottom lip sticking out. Kris smiled. “Want me to tell you about my home?” Yixing looked at him as he wiped at his eyes.

“I’ve never actually been on land before,” Yixing said.

“It isn’t all that great,” Kris said with a shrug. “I was raised by my parents in a small coastal town that very few people have ever heard of in southern China. My father was a fisherman by trade, and an explorer by heart. He spent a lot of time working on ships that traveled far, so I spent a lot of time with my mother.” Kris looked at Yixing who was listening with wide eyes and a curious expression. “My mother liked to cook. She tried to teach me, but I could never learn. She used to read me the letters that my father sent us when he was away. He would tell us about the sea, the storms he encountered, and all the exotic places he visited.”

“Did your father ever see--” Yixing didn’t finish his thought but Kris could guess what he was thinking.

“No. At least not that he ever told me,” Kris said with a smile. “He would send us letters when he was away, and then he’d teach me everything he knew when he was home. About sails and knots. Navigation and currents. My father was a sailor and it was only destiny that I’d be one too. He’s the one who made me realize that we had to protect the sea and treat her right.” Kris reached out and tentatively touched his fingers to Yixing’s cheek. Yixing didn’t pull away but he did seem puzzled by the action. “To treat her people right.”

Yixing suddenly backed away, his eyes lowering to the floor. Kris froze, his hand still in the air, before pulling it back to rest by his side. “So,” Yixing whispered in an attempt to get back to their earlier topic, “what are your parents doing today?”

“My mother is no longer around,” Kris said. Yixing turned to him with an apologetic expression and Kris pulled his knees up to his chest. “She passed right around the time I became a man. My dad always says that if you stare out to sea long enough you can see her on the horizon.”

“I’m sorry.” Kris rested his chin on his knees. He hadn’t told anyone about his mother’s passing. The only people who missed her were Kris and his father.

“My father never was the same after she passed. He was only home for a few months before he left for a seven year voyage to the New World in the East. I’ve gotten a letter or two from him, but he doesn’t tell me about wonders anymore, like the passion he had for sailing died with my mother.” Yixing mimicked Kris’s position, dragging his knees up to his chest. His eyes seemed to water, and Kris’s eyes went wide. He hadn’t intended to make Yixing sad.

“I’m so sorry. You lost your family all at once. You don’t even have a home to go back to.” Kris shook his head.

“This is my home. Being at sea is home for me. As long as I get to do this everyday, then I’ll never be far from where I belong.” Yixing stared at him for a long time. Kris wasn’t sure what else to say, or what he should anticipate from Yixing. Eventually Yixing asked to be alone, and Kris could only oblige. He stood up quickly and made his way towards the door. He turned one last time to see Yixing crying into his hands.

 

Kris knew something was wrong when he walked onto the deck three days later and saw the door to the cargo hold open. Nobody was on deck, not even a guard, so Kris didn’t bother being cautious. All he thought of was Yixing, Yixing, Yixing. Kris ran towards the door, nearly knocking it down in the process, before turning in every direction to find Yixing. He couldn’t see him anywhere, so he instinctively headed towards the shadowy corner where Yixing usually stayed. He stopped short when he saw a figure curled into a ball. He felt white, hot rage when he saw the pale display of Yixing’s naked form.

“What happened?” Kris bellowed. He ran to Yixing and kneeled down beside him. Yixing remained curled into a ball, so Kris reached out and touched Yixing’s shoulder. Yixing snapped up and slapped Kris’s hand away from him. Kris opened his mouth and tried to reach out to Yixing again, thinking that maybe Yixing was confused. Yixing pushed him away with a hiss. Kris’s eyes went wide.

Yixing was glaring at him through his tears with a busted lip and a large bruise on his cheek. Kris looked down and saw large, fist-sized bruises all over Yixing’s torso and arms. Kris saw the sheet that Yixing was using as clothing laying in tatters on the floor. Kris placed his hands up in surrender and Yixing hissed again, arm coming up in a defensive gesture.

“Yixing, I’m not going to hurt you,” Kris said. He know he sounded like he was pleading, but he needed Yixing to believe him. He never wanted to hurt Yixing, and he stood by that. In his heart, he only cared about helping Yixing get back to where he belonged. “I meant what I said about only wanting to help you.”

“You swore you would protect me,” Yixing cried, as the tears ran as heavy and fast down his face as they did that first day. “You said that you wouldn’t let them hurt me. But you lied. I called out for you to help me, but you never came.”

Yixing hunched over as he sobbed harder, and Kris didn’t hesitate to to grab Yixing and pull him close. Yixing didn’t push him away. Instead Yixing’s hands tightened in Kris’s shirt as he curled in on himself. Kris held him tight, hands ghosting over the purple bruises forming on Yixing’s skin. Kris was so angry that anyone could possibly hurt Yixing, could raise a harmful hand against him. Yixing’s shoulders shook violently with his tears, and Kris just tried to bite back his rage so he didn’t scare Yixing.

“You never came,” Yixing cried. Kris rubbed his back and smoothed his hair.

“I’m so sorry, Yixing. I’m sorry that I failed you.” Kris suddenly felt tears sting his own eyes as he clutched Yixing harder. He blinked them away and looked down at Yixing’s battered body. There were close to ten vicious bruises painted all over his body, and Kris couldn’t breath around his anger when he saw the long, finger-like ones placed on Yixing’s hip. It made him scared to know the answer to the next question he would ask. “Yixing, did the man who did this to you force himself on you?” Yixing looked up at him with a confused expression. Kris took a shaky breath as he forced his voice to work. “Did he force himself inside of you?” Yixing broke out into a fresh wave of tears, and Kris felt his throat close.

“No,” Yixing said as he buried his face in Kris’s chest. “No, he tried to but I kept fighting him off and that’s when he started--” He couldn’t finish his sentence as the memories came back to him, and Kris nodded and he crushed Yixing against him.

“Do you know who it was? Tell me who did this to you and I swear that I will make them pay for it. I couldn’t defend you, Yixing, but I will avenge you. Just tell me who is was.”

“The man with the injured arm,” Yixing said. Kris nodded.

“The one you bit?” Yixing nodded again as he brought his hands up to wipe at his eyes. Kris pushed Yixing away from him gently. “Can you stand?” Yixing nodded slowly, and Kris stood up before offering his hands to Yixing. Yixing seemed to shake his head in confusion. “I’m getting you off this ship tonight.”

Yixing grabbed his hands and Kris helped him up. He was shaky on his feet, obviously not used to them, and he staggered into Kris. Kris caught him with a hand on his waist, and Yixing clutched at his arms for support. Kris looked down, slightly shocked to find that Yixing was so much shorter than he was. Yixing looked up at Kris, and Kris swore he saw red splash across Yixing’s cheeks in the dark room. This was the first time they’d stood side by side, but also the first time they were pressed so close.

“I need you to wait here until I come get you,” Kris said as he helped Yixing stand on his own. Yixing looked at him with a panicked expression, and Kris smoothed back the fringe from his forehead. “I’ll be coming back. I just need to do something, and then I’ll come back. Just wait for me in the shadows. There isn’t anyone on deck so this is the perfect opportunity.”

“You promise you’ll come back?” Yixing asked. Kris let his hands come up and clutch Yixing’s face, thumb gently tracing the bruise on Yixing’s cheek.

“May I be dragged to the bottom of the sea if I don’t.” Yixing nodded and Kris pulled away. He walked out of the room in search of the monster who had assaulted Yixing. He would make them regret the decision to ever go near the beautiful creature. Kris would show them what happened when you messed with the sea’s people.

 

Kris tightened his hands around the man’s throat. The man’s face was turning red, and Kris only tightened his grip. The man had been incredibly easy to sneak up on and once Kris, much bigger and stronger, wrestled him to the ground, the man was as good as dead. Which was exactly what Kris wanted him to be.

The man tried to get Kris’s hands off him by slapping at Kris and clawing at his hands. Once the oxygen stopped making its way to his brain, the man stopped fighting. So Kris squeezed and squeezed until all man’s fight rushed out of him. Eventually the man passed out and Kris let his throat go. But Kris wasn’t done. His rage was still red hot, and Kris would leave the judgment for the man up to the only thing that could decide.

So he picked the man up, brought him to the edge of the deck, and hoisted him overboard. He held his breath until the body disappeared under the water. Kris had never killed anyone before. He’d never even had the desire to take a life, and yet he’d just killed a man because of what that man had done. He’d killed for Yixing, a stranger.

Kris took a deep breath before he rushed back to the cargo hold. Yixing was standing right where Kris had asked him to, and when Kris came through the door, Yixing’s eyes closed in relief. Kris grabbed his wrist and started pulling Yixing behind him. He needed to move fast, and get Yixing off the ship. If any of the men caught them before Yixing was off, then Yixing would be trapped until shore. He needed to do this.

They emerged from the cargo hold right as Kris heard a yell from below deck. Yixing looked at him with scared eyes and Kris rushed them over to the side of the ship. He quickly hoisted Yixing onto the railing, expecting Yixing to just jump. But Yixing stopped and turned to him. Kris’s eyes went wide, but Yixing just stared.

“I meant what I told you,” Yixing said. “The sea will repay you for your kindness.” Then Yixing leaned forward and kissed Kris. Kris’s eyes went wide as Yixing pressed against him hard. Kris blinked his eyes close, and tried to memorize the feeling of Yixing’s lips against his. Just when Kris thought the whole world around them had ceased to spin, Yixing pulled away. Kris tried to think of something to say. “Thank you. I hope we can meet again.”

Then Yixing dove over the side of the boat and into the water.

No sooner had Yixing disappeared below the water that men were suddenly shouting on deck. Kris turned just in time for one of the men to grab him and force him to the ground. He hit the deck with a loud thud. There was more shouting as two men tore through the cargo hold in search of Yixing. Kris smiled in relief that Yixing was free. They couldn’t have him.

“Someone get the captain!” Kris heard a lot of running and more shouting. He tried to stand up, but suddenly more hands were holding him down. He lifted his head to try to see what was happening when he felt a sudden sharp pain ricochet through his skull. He tried to blink away the sting, but it didn’t seem to leave.

“What’s happening?” Kris heard the Captain shout. Someone could be heard answering the captain that both one of the crew members and the merman were missing. The captain went into a fit of shouting, threatening to throw Kris over the edge of the boat. Kris was lifted up by the men holding him. Kris was positioned in front of the captain, who wasn’t sparing Kris any of his rage.

“He helped the sea creature escape,” one of the men holding Kris said.

“But I heard two loud splashes and the man that was guarding the creature is missing too,” another one of the men said. The Captain turned vicious eyes on Kris, and Kris felt disgusted. The Captain didn’t care that Kris had killed one of the men. He only cared that his chance at fortune was gone. The Captain only gave Kris a once over before he gave his verdict.

“Then throw him overboard,” the Captain said. He turned away from them, and the men holding Kris immediately began to drag him towards the very place where Yixing had disappeared over the edge of the ship. Kris tried to struggle. Even being as strong a swimmer as Kris was, he couldn’t survive in those waters. Between storms, the endless sea, and the threat of sea creatures, no human could.

“Wait!”

Everyone turned to see the same man who had stopped Kris from interfering when Yixing had been captured. He was making his way towards the Captain, who was looking at him with a raised eyebrow. The men holding Kris stopped too, waiting to see what was going to be said.

“He saved all of our lives,” the man said. The Captain scoffed. “During that last storm, we would have lost our sails and possibly the mast if it weren’t for him. I believe in an eye for an eye. He saved our lives. So punish him, but don’t kill him.” He glanced at Kris, who kept his face emotionless. The Captain stared for a while too before he nodded.

“Fine. Don’t throw him overboard.” The men holding Kris relaxed slightly. “But tie him up and place him in the cargo hold. We’re dropping him off at the next port with no wages and I’ll make sure no ship hires him.” Kris was suddenly down on his knees again as one of the men began tying his hands together. He gasped as the hard feeling of the rope bit into his flesh, and suddenly a gag was placed into his mouth. “And in the morning, he’ll be receiving thirty lashes.”

Kris was hauled up again before he was brought to the cargo hold where he was thrown harshly to the ground to contemplate what he’d done. His survival instinct was screaming at him for risking himself for someone he didn’t know. He was berating himself for sacrificing nearly ten months of wages for a stranger. He wouldn’t be able to afford food or shelter. He’d basically killed himself over Yixing.

But in his heart, Kris couldn’t really give a damn. He’d saved a helpless person. He rescued one of the sea’s people, and he would do it again in a second. Especially for someone like Yixing. Someone so kind and beautiful and genuine. Kris would risk anything to save someone like Yixing. It was quite possible that Yixing was right. The sea could repay him back for his kindness.

Kris hoped that maybe she’d pay him back by letting him meet Yixing again and, this time, see the beautiful man smile instead of cry.

 

Morning came swiftly, and Kris tried to keep his head high when the men came for him. Kris had never received lashes nor had he ever seen anyone recieve them, but his heart began to pound when he saw the man holding the whip off to the side. It was thick and made of hard leather, and Kris immediately started trying to ready himself for the inevitable sting of injustice. He had done no wrong by helping Yixing, but he would bear scars for his good deed, nonetheless.

The men brought him to the main mast where he was tied against it, face pressed to wood and back open. His hands were tied around the other side, giving him some slight flexibility, but he was limited to how much he could move around the mast. Kris could see the crowd gathering around to watch his punishment. Kris frowned. Of course these men, the same men who did nothing to help Yixing, would find entertainment from his pain.

“We are several days from port,” the Captain said. “When we get there, we’ll drop him off. But first I want to make sure that he is punished for harming a fellow crewman. Let this be a lesson to all of you.” Kris heard the whip crack. “I deal with insubordination with a heavy hand.”

Kris wasn’t exactly sure what lashes would feel like. He expected an initial sting and a lasting burn. He was expecting to feel an ache deep in his bones as his skin tore and his muscles strained to relieve the pressure. Kris was expecting pain, more than he’d ever felt before. Kris waited with his eyes closed for when the whip would be snapped towards him like a venomous cobra, ready to sink her fangs into her prey.

It was excruciating. When the whip tore across his back, Kris’s whole body was set on fire. It felt as though someone had dragged a heated knife across his skin and let the blade rest there just to burn the pain in. His body jerked forward and reflexively turned away from the source of the blow, which caused the skin to shift and burn. Kris gasped when he received the first lash, and he was too busy trying to fight through the pain that the second lash took him by surprise.

This time the whip made a track over the previous wound, reawakening the dulling pain from the first wound. Kris pressed himself against the mast and dug his hands into the wood. His eyes remained closed and he clenched his jaw shut . He would fight through the pain, and he’d do it without making a sound. He wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of hearing him cry out from the pain.

After about fifteen lashes, Kris lost his resolve. One of the lashes landed vertically across his back, simultaneously slicing through the tender skin on his neck as well as all the previous lash marks. Kris couldn’t stop himself from crying out as his pride was smashed by the pain invading his body. His scream was accompanied by wet, hot tears streaming down his cheeks. Even the strongest men could be broken down.

Kris kept himself from passing out but just barely. By the time the thirty lashes were done, his mind was so hazy with pain that he didn't even register being carried to the cargo hold where he was placed on his stomach and tied up once again. He could vaguely register the feeling of blood on his back, but Kris was just trying to breathe. He just wanted to stay alive. Before he finally passed out, he asked himself if Yixing was really worth it.

And almost immediately, he said yes.


	2. Drift (A Year and a Half Later)

“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”

Kris turned to the shorter man beside him who had spoken. He had a round face with smiling eyes, and his windswept hair was tossed in all directions. His Mandarin was poor which made Kris guess that he wasn’t a native. Possibly from Korea.

“She is,” Kris agreed when he looked back at the ship. The ship had docked in the port where he was working only days ago, and Kris couldn’t take his eyes off of her. She was one of the largest ships that Kris had ever seen, and the sails were large with a proud flag flying atop. But the most beautiful part was the mermaid figurehead at the front. The name Black Pearl was painted onto the side, branding the ship with her own name.

It had been over a year since he’d last been on a boat. When he was thrown of the last one, the Captain kept his word. He’d slandered Kris’s name and from then on no one would hire him. He’d settled for working in the docks where even those men were weary of them. He was paid very little, and most of his money went to necessities and what he could save went to visits with Tao. Kris had certainly paid for what he’d done, and he had the raised scars on his back to attest to it.

Kris vaguely registered that the man was talking to him. He turned back to him. “I’m sorry. What?”

“No, I’m sorry. My Mandarin isn’t the best,” the man said with a smile. “I was saying that you tie a sailor’s knot. That’s a bowline knot, right?” Kris looked down at where he had just tied a bowline knot to secure the rope around some barrels. It was the best choice as it would not jam up or release easily. “Most non sailors don’t use a bowline knot. They go for an overhand or a figure eight. But you went for the bowline.” The man smiled at him with a knowing smile. “So you must be a sailor.”

“I was,” Kris whispered. The man looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Why’d you stop?” Kris looked at the man standing before him. He was certainly new to the area if he didn’t know about what Kris had done.

“I killed a man.” The man nodded in understanding. Kris was pretty sure that the polite conversation that they had been having was about to be over. Who honestly wanted to continue a conversation with a killer? People rarely cared why you did it. They just heard that you did and that was it.

“Did he deserve it?” the man asked much to Kris’s surprise. Kris opened his mouth to answer, but he stopped. Was the man trying to test him? Was he just curious?

“No one deserves to die like that,” Kris said. The man nodded with a smile.

“Then why’d you do it?” Kris bit his lip. He’d spent the last year trying to forget that face and those lips and that sweet voice. His chances of ever meeting Yixing again were so slim it pained Kris. So he had deemed it better to just forget the sea man rather than live his life upon shore with only longing.

“He harmed someone I cared about,” Kris said. The man took note of Kris’s use of the past tense, but he didn’t comment on it.

“Then I think you only did what every other man would have done.” Kris looked to the man with wide eyes. “What’s your name?”

“Kris.” The man put out his hand. Kris took it in his and shook the man’s hand.

“I’m Minseok. That ship, the one you’ve had your eye on? She’s mine.” Kris’s eyes got even wider. The man before him looked young. Certainly not much older than Kris. His already being a captain was a testament to his skills of command, navigation, and sailing. “She’ll be leaving tomorrow at midday and I want you on board.”

“Me, sir?” Minseok nodded. “But I just told you that I killed someone.”

“I know. I’ll make sure I tell the men to stay away from the people you care about.” Minseok smiled like he’d made a joke. He reached out and put a hand on Kris’s shoulder. “Listen to me. A true man, one who regrets what he’s done, admits to his sins when asked. You can’t see it yourself but the regret for what you’ve done is written all over your face. You won’t harm anyone else.”

“I can really join you?” Kris asked, weary. Minseok nodded with a smile.

“I would be disappointed if you didn’t join me. We could use more knots like yours.”

 

“You seem happy,” Tao said as Kris pushed him onto his back. Kris smiled as if to confirm Tao’s thought before he crashed their lips together. Tao liked it when Kris was happy, and in the past year and a half, he’d been happy very little. Tao had become something of a friend for Kris. Kris’s appointments ran longer than they should have, and eventually Tao stopped scheduling anyone after Kris. There was nothing romantic between them. Tao was the whore that Kris visited. Tao was also the only one who didn’t shun Kris for what he’d done. He’d seen the scars on Kris’s back and he’d merely smiled sadly at Kris. Kris had never told Tao about Yixing, but he had a feeling that Tao knew something.

Kris had meant to completely forget Yixing during the past year, yet his visits to Tao suggested exactly the opposite. Tao had not grown into the dream lover that Kris longed for. He could never come close because Kris had met his dream lover already. He’d wanted the sea, and Yixing was the sea. So everytime Kris visited Tao, he merely closed his eyes and imagined wavy fringe, soft brown eyes, and deadly lips.

“I’m finally returning to sea tomorrow,” Kris said once he and Tao were finished. They were laying side by side, like they usually did, and Kris couldn’t keep the stupid smile off his face. “After more than a year, someone asked me to join his crew. I never thought I’d ever get to go back, Tao.”

“I know,” Tao whispered. He did, too. As they became really close friends, Kris told Tao about his fear that he’d never get to go back. Tao had listened with an odd sense of understanding for someone who had never been out to sea and lived his life in a brothel.

“So this might be goodbye.” Tao smiled.

“Are you going to tell the other guy goodbye too?” Kris looked over at Tao with a puzzled expression. Tao nudged Kris with his elbow. “You know, the guy you think about when you’re with me.”

“I--I don’t--I mean--” Tao laughed.

“Kris, it’s okay. I can see the signs easily. You keep your eyes shut during the whole thing and when you finally open them, disappointment is written all over your face. I know it isn’t me. There’s someone else, but something is keeping you from being with him.”

The whole expanse of the ocean, Kris thought.

“Are you going to have to tell him goodbye too?”

“No,” Kris said. “This might actually bring me to him.” Tao nodded.

“So he lives somewhere else and you must have met during your travels. Well I hope that this works out for you.” Kris was taken aback by the sincerity in Tao’s tone. Sure, they were friends. But Tao was losing a loyal customer and friend, and yet he seemed so supportive of Kris. It was also the sad glint in Tao’s eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Kris said. Tao smiled.

“For what?”

“For thinking of someone else.” Tao shook his head while he laughed.

“Would you like to know a secret?” Kris nodded. “I think of someone too.”  Kris couldn’t keep the surprised expression off of his face. He’s not sure what he always assumed that Tao got from all this, but it never occurred to him that maybe Tao had someone he loved too. “Not just with you. I think of Sehun when I’m with all my clients.”

“Sehun?” Tao’s smile was blinding and Kris thought he understood. He imagined that if he were to ever see Yixing again, he’d smile like that too.

“He sells apples in the market. He sells the brightest, most beautiful apples. Sometimes I want to spend all my money on fruit.” Tao laughed. “We met when he decided to go out with his friends one night. They came here, and Sehun spent a whole week’s worth of sale on me. I expected it to be just like every other appointment.”

Kris could see the adoration so plainly on Tao’s face that he felt bad for never trying to learn more about Tao before. In their year long friendship, all of their bonding was over Kris. He never once tried to know or understand Tao. It was a shame too because it seemed like Tao had wanted to tell someone about the merchant he had sold his heart too.

“He was actually too embarrassed to do anything. Since he paid for the whole hour, I let him stay with me. We talked which sounds so silly considering that people pay me to do incredibly dirty things. But that’s all we did. I’ve never had someone do that for me. Just want to hear what I had to say.” Tao just shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, that he had fallen for a man who represented a monumental stage in his life.

“Then why don’t you leave here and tell him how you feel?”

“I can’t,” Tao said sadly. “I’m still in debt to the man who owns this place. Besides I can’t see him or tell him that I love him until I’m done here. I can’t be with him and continue to service other men. Once I work off my debt, then I’ll go to him.” Tao and Kris both realized that Tao’s chances of working off his debt were nonexistent. He wasn’t cheap, by no means, but his debt increased every week and the rate was higher than his asking price.

Kris realized that he and Tao were stuck in the very same situation. They were both separated from the people they cared about because of the different worlds they came from. Tao’s profession and growing debt would keep him from ever being with the man who listened to him, and Kris’s human form would always keep him from being with Yixing. They were both trapped without much help.

Kris looked at Tao’s sad eyes before he realized that both of them weren’t beyond help. Kris immediately got up and walked over to his pants. Tao watched him with a curious expression. Kris reached into the back pocket where he kept all of his money. He couldn’t afford a home, so he stayed in taverns and felt safer keeping all his money on his person. He pulled out the folded bills. It wasn’t a lot. Kris was paid very little, but he think that it would be a good start.

He turned and handed the bills to Tao. Tao took it with wide eyes. He counted it out and nearly gasped before trying to hand the money back to Kris. Kris shook his head and refused, so Tao waved the bills through the air.

“This is too much, Kris. It’s nearly four times my rate.”

“I know,” Kris said. He leaned over and kissed Tao’s cheek. “Put that towards your debt.” Tao’s eyes started to prick with tears. “I don’t want you to be away from him if he means that much to you. So that money is my goodbye present to you, Tao. Thank you for being a good friend to me this past year.”

Tao clutched the money to his chest as he started to cry. He’d never had anyone do anything so nice for him before. The money was nowhere near enough to completely clear him of his debt, but it was enough to make a dent in it. If he cut back on borrowing clothes and worked hard, he could pay back his debt soon. Then he could be with Sehun.

Kris turned to go when Tao suddenly called out for him. Kris turned around and Tao’s face expressed all the gratitude that he could ever possibly voice. “You don’t be away from him either. Go be with him, whoever it is that your heart belongs to. You’re such a good man, Kris. I think you deserve to be happy with him.” Kris nodded before he flashed Tao a smile.

“I will. I’m going to find him again, and this time I won’t let him walk out of my life.”

 

Minseok smiled when he saw Kris approach the ship in the early morning. He’d already assembled the crew for last minute information regarding their next destination. He’d also explained to them that they were getting a new crew member. Most of them were very curious as to who would be joining their voyage so late, but no one asked any questions beyond the information that Captain Minseok gave them. When Kris climbed on board, small rucksack over his shoulder, he was greeted with small waves and curious stares.

“They’re all staring,” Kris said as he followed Minseok. Minseok, Kris thought that maybe he should call him Captain now, insisted on personally showing Kris around the ship. The layout was similar to every other ship, but it made Kris feel happy and welcomed for Minseok to take Kris around.

“We haven’t picked up a new sailor since we left from our original destination. They’re all just a little curious as to what you’ll bring to the crew.”

“And do they know about me?” Minseok shook his head, and Kris was stunned.

“I asked you on board this ship because I saw the regret in your eyes. But the other men won’t take the chance to see it, so I suggest keeping that information to yourself.”

“You don’t think they’ll find out?” Kris asked. Minseok winked at him.

“I won’t tell them if you won’t.”

 

Kris looked around at the room full of cannons, gunpowder, and ammunition.

“This is a navy ship,” he whispered. Minseok nodded, a proud look settling over his features.

“The fastest ship the navy has to offer. The Black Pearl has seen the capture of many fugitives and pirates in local waters. She’s got a strong, resilient crew and her agile build gives her great speed.” Kris looked at Minseok in awe.

“You’re so young to be a Captain, one in the navy nonetheless.”

“I had my position given to me by the previous owner of the ship who passed away a few years back. He chose me because I followed his every move and learnt how to be a captain.” Kris nodded. To be so young and worthy was truly awe inspiring. “But enough about me. Let’s put those sailor’s knots of yours to good use.”

 

Minseok insisted that Kris follow him around. Occasionally he’d ask that Kris go assist another section with the sails or cleaning. Mostly, however, Kris overshadowed Minseok. Minseok would ask that Kris show him what he can do. He’d make Kris tie knots, read maps, and predicate both weather and current patterns. He was always interested in seeing what all Kris was capable of. He was constantly testing Kris’s knowledge, to see what was already known and how much room he had to learn. He would smile wide whenever Kris would say something correct and he was quick to praise.

Kris liked him a lot. Minseok was everything that Kris had always thought a captain should be. Kris looked up to him immensely. He was gentle, but stern when he needed to be. He listened to everyone’s opinion and greatly considered thoughts from other people. He knew how to run a ship, and he often assisted deck hands whenever they needed extra help. He gave praise where it was necessary. He rarely had to deal with insubordination because all the men respected him too much to disobey him. Kris admired him and wished to gain approval in his eyes.

One day, after three months on the ship, Minseok called Kris into his quarters. Kris went happily, expecting Minseok to ask him to be on lookout or to meet with the ship’s navigator for a counsel. He wasn’t expecting Minseok to ask him to sit for dinner.

“Kris, I wanted to talk to you about something. I didn’t tell you this when I asked you on board because I worried you wouldn’t say yes if I did.” Kris stared at Minseok with wide eyes, curious as to what Minseok had kept secret from him. Minseok motioned to the food placed on the table, and Kris tentatively cut into his fish. “But I’m not going to be the Captain of the Black Pearl for much longer. The Navy wants me to take on a new ship and crew in an attempt to replicate the Black Pearl’s success.”

Kris nodded as he took a bite of his fish. He wasn’t sure where Minseok was going with all of this. Minseok didn’t elaborate immediately. He let Kris eat, enjoying the wonderful meal he’d had the cook make. He wanted to make sure Kris listened to everything he said, and he was sure Kris would with a full stomach.

“I’ll need someone to take over for me. I refuse to leave the Black Pearl to just anyone. I want to leave her to someone that I believe has the authority to keep her in good shape.” Minseok looked at Kris, and Kris’s brain finally caught up. He placed his utensils down and gasped.

“You can’t me that you want me to take over? I’ve only just joined and I know nothing about leading or running a Navy ship. I’ve never even been in a battle. I can’t lead.”

“That’s why I’m going to teach you, Kris. I want you to shadow me, learn from me, like I did with my predecessor.”

“But why me? I’m nobody.”

“You can’t see it, Kris, but you have so much potential to be a great man. You aren’t bitter over what happened to you, and you even feel remorse. You have so much passion and you care a lot about the sea and the ship. You are obedient and it’s the strongest followers that make the best leaders. You know what it’s like to follow a good captain. Now it’s time for you to be a good captain.”

“I’m so young,” Kris whispered. Minseok smiled.

“Then may you lead for a long time.”

 

Minseok was serious about teaching Kris. Everytime he sat down to fill out papers or make logs, he made Kris watch. He talked Kris through every action and decision he made so that Kris would understand the logic. He wanted Kris to be a captain, a good one. He wanted Kris to take note of everything he did. He always asked Kris to repeat everything he learned and he asked Kris to make his own predictions and assessments.

After six months on board, Minseok felt that Kris was more than prepared to start making his own decisions. He kept urging Kris to start placing orders himself, or even relay orders from Minseok himself, but Kris felt incredibly uncomfortable. He was still the newest member of the crew which gave him little authority. He could be taught about how to lead, but actually gaining the courage was going to take months on it’s own.

Unfortunately neither Kris nor the crew had that time.

 

“Black sails! Captain, I see black sails!”

Every head turned to look at the horizon. Nothing was directly visible, but the lookout in the nest had an impeccable eye and no one doubted what he claimed to see. Kris, who stood beside Minseok, turned to look at the Captain. Minseok wore a grim face as he searched the horizon for the black sails.

“There,” he said, pointing to a spot far away in the distance. He then motioned for a spyglass, which was presented to him shortly thereafter. He took one look through it, before handing it to Kris. Kris looked to where Minseok had pointed. Even through the spyglass, the ship was small. The massive black sails, however, were ominous in meaning. The ship was heading towards them swiftly, and he didn’t doubt that they would be upon the Black Pearl soon.

“Pirates?” Kris asked. Minseok nodded.

“Everyone!” Minseok called. The crew all turned from the dot in the distance. “That is a pirate ship. The Black Pearl has been in plenty of battles with similar pirates, so you all know what to do. Raise the Navy flag so they know full and well that they have the chance to either surrender or fight. If they choose to fight, which they most likely will, then we will be prepared to sink them. Load all cannons. Prepare for battle.”

Everyone quickly began moving into their respective positions. Kris, as dictated by Minseok, remained by the Captain’s side. This wasn’t the first naval battle Kris had been involved in. Since he’d joined the Black Pearl, he’d been involved in three minor scrimmages. Each ending in victory for the Black Pearl. They’d suffered small damages to the ship, but they’d captured multiple pirate refugees in the process. The Black Pearl was an exemplary naval ship, and Kris learned a lot by shadowing Minseok during the fights.

“What should I do, Sir?” Minseok heard the men shouting orders back and forth, and he turned to Kris.

“Gather our blades. We must be ready if they do somehow board.” Kris nodded before he ran to the Captain’s quarters to get Minseok’s blade, a sharp saber that he was deadly with. After retrieving the Captain’s, Kris retrieved his own. Minseok insisted that Kris keep his in the Captain’s quarters as well so that Minseok could tend to it as he did his own. Kris was fairly decent with a blade. He’d never had to actually use it; he’d never fought anyone before. Something in his gut told him that this battle might possibly be different.

Kris was just tying the scabbard to his side when the first cannon was fired. The blast sent a shockwave through the ship, and Kris lost his footing and fell. A second cannon was fired, and Kris immediately stood to make his way to the Captain. He opened the door to the Captain’s quarters, right as someone shouted. Kris looked out just as an explosion rocked the ship.

“We’ve been hit!” Someone shouted. Kris purposefully didn’t look towards the left where the impact had occurred. He quickly ran towards the Captain, who waited with a pale face on the quarterdeck. When Kris reached the Captain, he was able to survey the damage, quite a massive chunk missing out of the hull, as well as the large ship sailing along side them. Cannons were being fired from both ships, a vast majority of the cannonballs missing the ships, but the damage being done to the Black Pearl was inimaginable.

When one of the cannons landed a shot on the main mast, a loud crack rang out over the ship. Everyone froze as the wood split, cracking up the shaft. Once the tear reached halfway up, the wood cracked under the stress and the mast fell over. Minseok's eyes went wide as the mast crashed onto the deck causing it to crack as well. He turned to Kris immediately. He grabbed Kris’s hand and put something in it. Kris pulled his hand back and looked at what he was given.

It was the Captain's ring, the one that distinguished his status in the Navy.

"Captain, I don't understand." He tried to give Minseok his ring back, but Minseok shook his head.

"Listen to me. If those pirates board this ship, they'll kill everyone.  And even if they didn't, I still wouldn't abandon my ship in this state. If she goes down, I go down with her. The Black Pearl is mine and I can't let her sink alone. I'm going to order everyone off the ship, and I want you to take this ring to a naval base and explain to them that I have given you my ship. They'll give you one of your own."

"Captain, I can't leave you. I should stay."

"No, Kris. You will leave. Take one of the rowing boats and go. You need to ensure that the legacy of this ship continues. What do you think I've been training you for?" Minseok turned away from him and looked at the pirate ship cruising alongside them. It was almost close enough for them to board, and Minseok realized that he was running out of time.

"Men!" He shouted at the crew, They all turned to the Captain. "Everyone abandon ship. This is an order. It appears we've met a ship that was too great an adversary, and I fear the Black Pearl will sink. So everyone needs to escape now."

"With all do respect Captain," one of the men shouted. "We're not abandoning the Pearl. She's our ship too."

"This is an order," Minseok said.

"We're not going," Kris said. Minseok turned to him. "We all found our place on this ship and none of us are going anywhere."

"Dammit, Kris--" But Minseok didn't get to finish because the very next second the pirate ship was alongside them and the pirates were preparing to board. One of the men cried out to rally the ship and the second the pirates boarded, fighting broke out. Minseok drew his sword and waited for the fighting to reach him. Kris drew his sword to, but Minseok shook his head and pushed him towards the  railing. "Go! You need to take my ring to a base. Go."

Kris wanted to protest but before he could open his mouth someone screamed. Minseok and Kris both turned to see one of the pirates stab a man through his stomach. Another cry rang out and Kris witnessed another man die. He glanced once at Minseok before he ran towards where the lifeboats were on the side of the ship. He wanted to stay and fight, but he knew it would end in his death. Minseok was right. The Black Pearl's legacy needed to live on and her record needed to be replicated.

Kris weaved his way through the people. He had a few pirates attack him but before he could kill or be killed another crew member would interfere and fight on his behalf. So he just continued running towards the lifeboat. He couldn't survive these waters without a boat of some sort. The waters were too rough and unpredictable. He needed to reach those life boats.

Kris was just climbing in one when he glanced back at Minseok. Minseok was engaging in a fight with two pirates who seemed to be gaining an upper hand. Kris hesitated for just a second and watched as one of the pirates grabbed Minseok by the throat and stabbed him. Kris screamed out but it was lost amongst all the fighting. He couldn't believe his eyes. The man he'd spent so much time admiring had just been killed before Kris's eyes.

Kris turned away and started untying the ropes keeping the lifeboat attached to the ship. The knots were tight, meant to prevent them from being lost in a storm, and Kris tried to laugh at the fact that it was his knot he was having trouble with. Minseok always did commend him on his knots. Kris stopped trying to untie them and glanced up just as two pirates were closing in on him. Kris took a deep breath, slipped the ring on his finger, and dove off the side into the black abyss below.

  
  


"Yixing, wait." Yixing didn't slow down. He merely swam through the water faster. His scout had told him that a ship had sailed through their territory just two days before. The word was that a certain tall, broad shouldered sailor was on board. It was the only lead Yixing had heard in almost two years. He had to look into it.

Just before Yixing broke the surface in the area where the ship had been spotted, someone grabbed ahold of him. He turned to see Luhan right behind him, an angry expression on his face. Yixing tried to free himself, but Luhan had always been a stronger merman.

"Luhan, let me go. I have to check."

"No, Yixing, you have to come back with me. If the Elders realize your gone, do you know what they'll do to you." Yixing grabbed Luhan's shoulders and gave him a pleading look.

"Please, Luhan. I just need to see if it really is him."

"And if it is?"  Yixing didn't say anything. He wasn't entirely sure what he would do if it was. He couldn't board that ship or even get near it. But he still needed to see, needed to be sure that his savior was still alive.

"I'm just going to look, Luhan. I promise. Besides you're here. You'll protect me." Yixing smiled and Luhan couldn't keep himself from groaning.

"You have a minute at the most." Yixing's smile was blinding, that dimple making Luhan frown at his own stupidity. He let Yixing go and Yixing immediately went to the surface. Luhan nodded before he swam to the surface too.

The first thing Luhan noticed was that there wasn't one ship. There were two and they seemed to be locked in a battle. Luhan and Yixing were still a good enough distance away that they weren't in danger, but Luhan couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't safe. He turned to Yixing to try and pull him back, but Yixing's face was afraid as his sharpened his eyes searched every face on either ship. Luhan was finally about to duck back under the water when Yixing screamed.

"That's him!" Yixing screamed. Luhan looked to see a sailor dive off the side of the boat. Yixing gasped before he ducked under the water. Luhan cursed before he dove after his friend. Yixing was already swimming towards the ships. Luhan tried to overtake him to prevent Yixing's advance. But while Luhan had always been stronger, Yixing had always been a better and faster swimmer.

Yixing stopped abruptly, eyes searching the water for the sailor while his tail twirled in the water to keep him in place. Luhan stopped too and grabbed Yixing, attempting to pull him away. Yixing gasped again and continued swimming once he located his sailor. Luhan watched as Yixing swam to the sinking body. Luhan swam closer as Yixing grabbed hold of the body and swam towards the surface. Luhan broke surface at the same time as Yixing who was carrying the human.

"He's too heavy," Yixing said as he slipped under again. Luhan looked up at the large hull of the ship that was just in front of them. They were too close to humans. They needed to swim away before something like what happened to Yixing two years ago happened again.

"Yixing, leave him. We must go."

"No," Yixing said. He grabbed his human's face and tried to hold it above the water. "Help me get him to land, Luhan." Luhan remained immobile where he was. "Luhan help me carry him or I'm going to try it alone." Yixing began swimming away. He was moving slowly because he couldn't duck under the water to swim. He was limited to only using his lower body as he held the human above water. The extra weight wasn't helping him either. Luhan knew if he didn't help Yixing, both of them would get killed or, worse, captured.

Luhan ducked under the water and grabbed the human's legs. He broke surface to find Yixing smiling at him gratefully. "There is a small island but it's nearly a mile away. He may not make it, but I'll help." Yixing nodded and the two of them set to work trying to carry the human away. They were still moving slower than either of them could have swum on their own, but they seemed to make it away without being noticed. A loud crash sounded behind them when they were a good enough distance away and they both stopped to watch as one of the ships sank into the water.

"We have to move," Yixing said. Luhan nodded and they continued on.  When they neared the island, Luhan swam ahead so he could shift forms and help maneuver the human onto land. Yixing left him in the shores and Luhan grabbed under the human's arms to carry him onto the sand. Yixing carried himself on land where he shifted quickly to run to the sailor's side.

"Kris," Yixing shouted as he fell to his knees in the sand beside the sailor. He reached out and grabbed Kris's face, trying to judge if he was okay. He leaned closer but he couldn't hear any breathing. "Luhan, help him. You have to save him. You know humans so do something."

Yixing was right. Luhan had spent the last ten years of his hundred year old life interacting with humans and learning everything he could about them. Luhan spent a vast majority of his life living with a human man named Jongin who taught Luhan everything he needed to know. Of all the merfolk, Luhan was best equipped to deal with humans. That did include knowing how to care for them when they were sick and wounded.

"No," Luhan said. Yixing looked up at him with wide eyes. "No, it's best for us if he dies and we return home. Then you can stop obsessing over him and everything will turn out for the best--"

"Luhan, please. You can't just let him die." Luhan made no move to do anything but he saw Yixing's eyes sparkle with tears. "I won't go home with you if you let him die. If you don't help him, then I'm going to stay here until I die too." Luhan clenched his jaw and tried to see if Yixing was joking. The tear that slipped down his cheek told Luhan that he was not.

He cursed before he dropped to his knees on the other side of Kris. He reached out and grabbed the human's face before tilting it back and delivering a kiss. Yixing looked confused but Luhan just blew air into the human's mouth. Then he pulled back and pushed on the human's chest. Jongin had taught him how to help people who had drowned, so he was using that knowledge to help Yixing's sailor.

After going through this routine a few more times, Kris's body twitched. His back arched and he coughed up the water that had been in his lungs. Then he coughed a few more times and his eyes blinked open. His eyes were incredibly unfocused and he looked around in an attempt to understand where he was.

Yixing leaned over more and grabbed his face. He knew he was crying but he couldn't really help himself. Kris was alive and after so much looking, he was finally reunited with Yixing. Kris's eyes focused in on Yixing's face and he blinked a few more times.

"Yixing?" he asked. Yixing smiled incredibly wide and nodded, unable to say anything around the tightness in his throat. Kris smiled a small smile before his eyes slipped close and he fell unconscious. Yixing breathed a sigh of relief and pressed his forehead to Kris's. He was still breathing and Yixing was so happy that he'd be okay.

Luhan watched with a frown as Yixing rearranged himself and put his head on Kris's chest. He wrapped his arms around the sailor, and Luhan stood up. Yixing followed him with his eyes but he didn't move.

"Let's go," Luhan said. Yixing shook his head. "I saved him, so we need to leave now. We have to go before anyone notices we left."

"You go ahead. I'll catch up later. I just need a little more time with him."

"Yixing, I'm not going to leave you behind to fall in love with some human."

"Too late for that."

"Yixing--"

"I swear. I'll be home soon." Yixing smiled. Luhan had known Yixing since he was really young and he knew when Yixing was lying to him.

"If they realize you're gone, I'm not covering for you," Luhan said as he made his way towards the water. Yixing nodded and clutched Kris tighter. He didn't want Luhan to get in trouble. But Yixing had spent the last year and a half searching for Kris. He wasn't going to just leave him now.

  
  


Kris opened his eyes and his first thought was that he was dead. The light was bright and Kris wasn't sure where he was, so he just assumed that he was dead. Then the sound of rushing water met his ears and Kris realized that he was on land. He tried to remember something, anything about what had happened. But he just remembered diving over the side of the ship.

He vaguely remembered seeing Yixing, but that must have been a dream.

Kris tried to sit up but before he could actually move, he felt a pressure on his shoulders that forced him to remain in his laying down position. He looked to the side and saw a figure lean over him. The sun made it hard to see features, but Kris had a feeling he knew who it was.

"You're awake," a soft voice said. The figure shifted and Kris saw Yixing staring down at him. Yixing smiled and reached out to touch Kris's cheeks.

"How did you--" Yixing smiled. He ran his hand down Kris’s cheek to his jaw the over his lips. Kris couldn’t think of anything beyond the feeling of Yixing’s fingers on his lips.

“I’ve been looking for you since you helped me escape. I had scouts looking for ships in our waters with sailors who fit your description. After so many dead ends, I finally found you.” Yixing leaned over and pressed his lips to Kris’s forehead. Kris sucked in a breath and his hands instinctively went to Yixing’s face. Yixing pulled back and smiled so wide.

“You’ve been looking for me? Why?”

“I needed to make sure that you were alright. I saw them grab you and I just needed to know that you were okay.” Kris chuckled.

“All of this to make sure I’m okay?”

“I also needed to see you again.” Yixing looked really serious. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you since you rescued me.” Kris smiled and ran a hand through Yixing’s hair.

“I haven’t--I haven’t stop thinking of you either.” Yixing smiled again. Then he leaned over and kissed Kris. It wasn’t a hungry or heated kiss. It was just the pressing together of lips, like their last kiss. But it was wonderful and it left Kris's insides fluttering.

Yixing pulled back and he couldn't stop himself from giggling. Kris smiled too and finally Yixing laid his head back on Kris's chest. Kris let his hands rest on Yixing's bare back. He waited to see if it would make Yixing uncomfortable, as it would have the last time they'd seen each other. Yixing only wrapped his arms around Kris and held him close.

Kris continued to hold Yixing for a few minutes before the wet state of his clothes made him uncomfortable. He tapped Yixing to tell him to sit up and Kris stood up when Yixing moved. He was unsteady on his feet, and Yixing quickly stood up to help him. Kris smiled down at him.

He looked around him and frowned. He had no idea where he was or how Yixing had actually saved him. He also had no idea what happened to the rest of his crew. "Yixing?" Yixing hummed in response and Kris looked back at him. "Was there anyone else?" Yixing frowned too and he shook his head.

"Luhan and I saw the ship sink. You were the only I saw get off." Kris nodded his head slowly before he raised his hand to look at the silver ring on his finger. Yixing glanced at it but he didn't understand it's value so he remained silent.

"I have to get out of these wet clothes or else I'll freeze when night comes. It's not going to bother you will it?" Yixing shook his head at Kris's question. Kris looked down at Yixing's own naked appearance before he nodded and stepped away. He quickly stripped off his shirt and moved towards the dry sand. He laid his shirt  on the sand before stripping off his pants and doing the same with them.

Yixing watched the whole scene with interest, eyes going wide when he had a full view of Kris's naked body. He'd seen Kris without a shirt back when they'd met before but he'd never seen Kris like this. Yixing didn't fully understand humans. Luhan was the expert, not him. Yixing didn't even really understand how his own body worked when he was on land. But he definitely knew that Kris was handsome and that he made certain parts of Yixing flutter to life.

Kris shifted and something caught Yixing’s eye. The light had seemed to cover them before but as Kris’s muscles moved and flexed so many angry, raised scars became heartbreakingly visible. Yixing sucked in a quiet breath as he counted them. One. Two. Three. So, so many of them and each one just as painful looking as the one layered under it. They were completely healed and Yixing could easily guess that this is what had become of Kris after he’d escaped. It made a pain form in Yixing’s chest that Kris had endured this because of him.

Kris turned back to catch him staring and Yixing looked away with a blush, the scars forgotten under the weight of Kris’s stare. Kris walked over and sat beside Yixing, who sat down too. He immediately put his head on Kris's shoulder and Kris reached down and grabbed Yixing's hand. Yixing sucked in a breath before he squeezed Kris's hand back. They sat like that for a long time until the sun was already past it's high point.

"Are you going to leave soon?" Kris asked. Yixing looked at him and shook his head.

"I spent nearly two years trying to find you. I'm not leaving after only a few hours." Kris smiled. "You won't mind my company?" Kris leaned over and kissed Yixing's forehead. Yixing blushed again before he leaned up and kissed Kris's lips. This kiss lasted a little longer than the last and when Kris pulled away it seemed as though Yixing was reluctant to let him.

"I promise that we'll have plenty of time for kisses. I can't see myself getting rescued off this island anytime soon." Yixing frowned.

"Can I help?"

"Not sure," Kris admitted. "The navy will know something happened to us when we don't show up for a report. They'll come to investigate but that could take days, weeks. I'll need to figure out someway to survive until then. I'll need food, clean water, warmth. I hope you didn't save me just for me to die here."

"No," Yixing said. "I can help. I can catch fish. It's what my people do for food so it's rather easy for me to do. I'm not sure how I can help you find water, but I'll do whatever I can. As for warmth, I can hold you when you're cold." It was Kris's turn to blush now at the idea of Yixing holding him close for warmth.

"I, uh, really appreciate it. Without my clothes, the wind off the water will be cold." Yixing reached out and placed a shaky hand on Kris's chest. Kris took a deep breath because the feeling of Yixing's hand on his bare skin was causing his heart to beat erratically. Yixing looked Kris in the eye and a silent promised past between them that sooner or later they'd get used to the feeling of their skin being together.

 

“Can I ask you something?” Kris asked. Yixing turned to him. They were sitting side by side. Kris and Yixing had worked together to start a fire, Yixing had collected all the wood he could find and Kris had started the spark by rubbing two stones together. It was small but as long as they fed it, it would supply enough warmth for them not to freeze. The sun had already fallen beneath the horizon and the temperature had dropped. Wind was coming off the water, whipping up sand and threatening their small fire. “How did you save me?”

“I was investigating. One of the scouts I had looking out for you told me that your ship had passed through so I came to check it out. Luhan and I got there right as you jumped. I got you and he helped me carry you here. Then Luhan used his knowledge about humans to make sure you didn’t drown.” Kris seemed confused so Yixing elaborated. “Luhan spends a lot of time on land, learning about humans in order to better protect our people. He’s learned all sorts of things from Jongin. That’s the man he stays with and learns everything from.”

“So I have Luhan to thank then.”

“He didn’t want to save you. He wanted to let you die.” Kris nodded solemnly just as Yixing shivered. Kris reached out and wrapped an arm around Yixing, pulling him close for warmth. “But I begged him not to.”

“Thank you,” Kris said. Yixing smiled and shook his head.

“As if I could have let you drown.” Kris’s grip tightened on Yixing tightened and Yixing snuggled even closer. Kris threw some more sticks in the fire, watched as it licked up and over them hungrily. Eventually Yixing brought his knees to his chest and stared down at his feet. Kris could tell he was thinking about something, and he thought it was odd that he felt like he’d known Yixing for eons. It had only been hours separated by nearly two whole years.

“Yixing, you know you don’t have to be afraid of me.” Yixing nodded.

“I’m just scared.”

“Of what?”

“Of how I feel about you. You’re human and I’m not. We have a whole sea that was meant to separate us and yet I feel like it’s unfair because all I want is to be right beside you. It’s wrong for me to feel that way.” Kris smiled and he grabbed Yixing’s chin to turn the smaller man to look at him.

“No it isn’t. It feels so wonderfully right. I’ve known it from the first second I saw you, tangled in those nets. You were--” Kris struggled to find the right words to explain how he felt. “You were everything I had been looking for but feared that I’d never find. The way we feel isn’t wrong.”

“But, Kris, we can’t be together. You live on land and--” Kris leaned forward and silenced Yixing with a kiss.  Yixing straightened out and grabbed Kris’s shoulders to steady himself. Kris kissed Yixing until his lungs were screaming at him for air and he pulled back slightly to take a breath. Yixing took the opportunity to cover Kris’s open mouth with his own and lick his way inside. Kris was taken aback for a second before he met Yixing’s advance with his own ferocity. Soon enough they were both so warm that wind wasn’t a problem and that warmth had nothing to do with the fire.

“How do you know?” Yixing asked as he pulled back a few inches and pressed his forehead to Kris’s. “How do you know you feel that way about me?”

“Because I feel it, Yixing.” Kris laughed before he kissed Yixing again. “How do you know?” Yixing sat back on his heels and looked at Kris. Kris had a brief moment where he worried that he’d insulted Yixing. But then Yixing grabbed Kris’s hand and placed it on his chest, over his heart.

“Because my chest feels tight when I think about you. It hurts and I can’t breath. My head gets all light and it feels like I’m somewhere else.” Kris smiled and he was pretty sure he looked really stupid. “Do you even know what it’s been like for the last two years? I’ve been trying to learn everything I could about humans just so I wouldn’t embarrass myself when I met you again. I can’t focus because everything makes me think of you. I’ve been feeling out of place in my own life because I couldn’t think about anyone who wasn’t the stupid sailor who risked himself for me.”

“Yixing--”

“And I can’t talk to anyone because they won’t approve so I’ve been feeling all this ache all alone.”

“Yixing--”

“I’ve been dreaming about the day that I’d get to see you again and everyday I woke up and prayed to the sea that she’d give you back to me.”

“Yixing, are you done? Can I talk?” Yixing looked at him, and Kris couldn’t help but smile at the embarrassed blush that spread over Yixing’s cheeks. “Yixing, I’m sorry that you’ve been alone in this for the past two years, but I’m here now. I’m here with you right now.”

“But for how long?”

“Don’t think about that. Just focus on me, on us, right now. We’ll worry about tomorrow when it comes.” Yixing nodded before he leaned over and rested his head on Kris’s shoulder. Kris reached up and smoothed down his hair. Yixing’s warm breath tickled his neck and it made Kris’s break out in gooseflesh. Yixing noticed the reaction and sat up immediately. He tilted his head to the side and stared at Kris’s skin.

“Are you cold?” He asked. Kris shivered almost immediately after, and Yixing reached out and grabbed Kris’s shoulders. Kris wasn’t expecting Yixing to push with a strength he seemed incapable of having and so, with an unmanly squeak, Kris found himself flat on his back in the sand. He had a brief second to try to guess what would happen next before Yixing’s body was laying on top of his own in an attempt to protect him from the cold.

And almost instantly, Kris’s whole body was way too warm. He swallowed around the thickness in his throat. He felt like he couldn't breathe because Yixing's naked body was covering his and it felt too intimate. He felt like he should say something, warn Yixing because he didn’t understand. He wasn’t human so he didn’t completely understand the reaction that Kris was having. The last thing Kris wanted was to scare Yixing away with something like this. Kris opened his mouth to say something but all that came out was a quiet hiss as Yixing shifted to look up at him.

“Kris?” he asked. Kris swallowed again. “Are you still cold?” Yixing reached down and ran his hands over Kris’s sides. Kris flinched before he sat up quickly, nearly tossing Yixing off of him. Yixing looked up at him with wide eyes.

“I’m fine,” Kris said as he stared at the sand. He brought his knees to his chest in what he hoped was a totally convincing movement. He couldn’t see Yixing or the emotions in his eyes. He could only assume he’d see judgment and confusion. Kris felt way too hot all over and he had no hope of relief.

“Kris?” Yixing asked, worry in his voice. Kris didn’t say anything but he heard Yixing shifting around in the sand. The next thing he knew he felt palms cover his knees and Yixing was kneeling in front of him. Kris glanced up and was given a view of Yixing’s smoothe, untouched and unblemished chest. He immediately had to look away. “Kris, it’s okay,” Yixing said as if he actually comprehended what Kris’s body was going through, what his mind was imagining.

“Yixing, you don’t understand.”

"I do, Kris."

"No you don't. You aren't like me so you don't really understand how humans, and their bodies, work."

"Kris, listen to me. I know and you shouldn't be worried about me. I-I want to do it too." Kris eyebrows pulled down in slight confusion. "It?" Yixing couldn't really mean "it", could he? Yixing wasn't a human and he didn't spend any amount of time on land. How could he possibly know what it was that he claimed to want?

"Do you even know what you're talking about?" Kris asked. Yixing's whole face turned red as he blushed and looked down.

"Sex," Yixing whispered and Kris thought he was gonna die at the expression of embarrassment on Yixing's face mixed with an undercurrent of want.

"Yixing--" Yixing bit his lip before he forced Kris's knees apart, displaying the very evidence of Kris's desire to know Yixing's body.

"I know you want to," Yixing said. "You're aroused. And I'm trying to tell you that I want to do it too. I want us to have sex."

"I don't think you know how sex works or if you'll even enjoy it."

"Stop treating me like I'm ignorant. I've spent the last year learning everything I could about humans from Luhan just so I wouldn't seem like a fool to you when we met again. That includes learning about sexual intercourse."

"But knowing how it works is different from doing it. You aren't human so what if you won't enjoy it. Do you even know how those parts of your human body work?"

"Yes," Yixing said before he looked away embarrassed.

"What?" Yixing just looked away and finally Kris took note of something else. He was so busy being worried about his growing erection that he didn't notice Yixing's, standing tall and proud. "H-how?"

"Luhan showed me how to illicit pleasure with just one person." Yixing raised one of his hands and Kris nearly coughed up a lung. "So I've been coming to small islands like this one and pleasuring myself so I would know how it felt. I've never been with anyone before but I figured that it was the most I could do. I wanted to be ready, for you."

"For me," Kris repeated and suddenly he wasn't all that embarrassed anymore. He was actually very touched. Yixing had been waiting for this moment for more than a year. It wasn't about having someone, anyone, take his virginity. It was about giving it to Kris.

"So when I tell you that I want to do this, I mean it. I want us to share in this experience." Kris nodded.

"This isn't the first time for me," Kris said honestly. He didn't want Yixing to be misunderstood about that. Yixing merely shrugged and smiled shyly.

"That's okay. It's the first time for me and I think that's special enough." Kris smiled before he reached out and pulled Yixing close to him. He placed a kiss on Yixing's forehead before placing one on his cheek.

"Just promise me that you'll tell me if you aren't enjoying it, okay?" Yixing nodded and so Kris leaned down to kiss him on the lips. Before their lips could connect, Yixing pulled back.

"There's one more thing," Yixing whispered. Kris nodded as a way of urging Yixing on. "I think I might be in love with you." Kris smiled wide and he knew he looked giddy with happiness. He could feel it in the way the muscles around his face hurt and his heart was beating out of his chest.

“I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you too,” Kris said. He was pretty sure of that fact too. Sure he may not know Yixing well at all or have know him for very long. But Yixing was what he wanted, what he’d always wanted. He’d always imagined being with the sea personified, and Yixing was just that. That and so much more. “You still have so much to know about me, Yixing.”

“Then tell me everything,” Yixing said before he wrapped his arms around Kris. “Show me everything.” Then he kissed Kris and Kris gladly accepted him. He grabbed Yixing’s face with his hands to keep the smaller man where Kris wanted him. Yixing’s hands weren’t as stationary and within seconds his hands were running down Kris chest.

“Your skin is so dry,” Yixing whispered between kisses. Kris stopped kissing him to laugh. Yixing looked embarrassed. Kris reached out and returned Yixing’s gesture and ran his own hand down Yixing’s chest. Yixing sucked in a breath and Kris smiled.

“I like your skin better." Yixing bit on his lip and Kris leaned forward to capture those lips. Yixing didn't have any reluctance about letting Kris into his mouth. Kris tried not to be too aggressive, wanting Yixing to experience what it was like to have another man in his mouth. This was the first time Yixing was getting so far with someone so Kris wanted him to be able to enjoy it.

Yixing tentatively reached down and placed one of his hands on Kris’s thigh. Kris pulled back to let out a low groan. Yixing looked down at where his hand rested on Kris’s thigh before he placed his other hand on Kris’s hipbone, right above Kris’s cock.

“It feels good?” Yixing asked. “When I put my hands on you?” Kris groaned again before he grabbed Yixing around the waist. He pushed Yixing back and then rolled him onto his back so that he was looking up at Kris from the sand. Kris then ran his hands up Yixing’s calves and thighs. The touch made Yixing involuntarily spread his legs and Kris fit himself in the now open space so he could lean over Yixing. He kissed Yixing’s neck, which pulled the first mewl from Yixing. It sounded like a surprised yelp that morphed into a whine, and it had Kris even more aroused than he was before.

“I don’t want to wait anymore,” Yixing whispered, his voice suddenly more ragged. Kris straightened out so he could look into Yixing’s eyes. He brushed Yixing’s course bangs away from his face. Afterwards he ran his fingers across Yixing’s cheeks and lips, and Yixing smiled beneath his fingers.

“I love you,” Kris whispered. Yixing nodded. “Two years was far too long too wait for me to be able to make love to you.”

“Then why are you still waiting?” Kris leaned over and kissed Yixing gently on the lips. He kissed his way to Yixing’s ear and Yixing’s breath caught in his throat.

“I promise that I won’t wait any longer,” Kris cooed. Yixing closed his eyes and smiled because this was exactly what he’d been waiting for, what he’d been thinking about. Everytime he crawled onto the shores of some desolate island to pleasure himself, it had always been Kris and his hands that Yixing thought of. A young sailor had helped him off the boat that he was held captive on, but Yixing didn’t leave that boat in one piece. He’d left his heart behind in the hands of his saviour.

 

A sudden gust of cold air off the water woke Kris up the next morning. The sun was bright though not at a high point which told him that it was still morning. He shivered to himself before a wide smile sweeped over his face. The night before he’d made passionate love to Yixing before falling asleep with the warmth of the smaller man protecting him from the night chill. Kris turned to his side, expecting to see Yixing sleeping beside him. However the space beside him was empty, clearly explaining why he had woken up cold.

Kris sat up quickly, heart beating too fast as he looked around in an attempt to find the merman. Yixing couldn’t have left him already, could he? Not after how magical last night had been for both of them. Yixing must have wandered off which honestly didn’t make Kris feel better since that meant that Yixing could possibly get hurt.

Kris jumped to his feet and strained his eyes to find Yixing. Suddenly a small brown dot appeared in the water. Kris breathed a sigh of relief when the blip in the water disappeared and Kris saw a fin appear where it had been. Yixing must have woken up before him and decided to go swimming. Kris smiled before he took off towards the water.

He quickly dove in and swam out towards where he had last saw Yixing. He searched around for Yixing while he kept himself afloat above the water, though Yixing did not appear to be coming to the surface to greet him. Yixing had to have seen him coming, or at least heard him swimming out, so he couldn’t understand why Yixing wasn’t showing up.

“Yixing!” The water to his left rippled and Kris reached out his hand, meeting soft and soaked skin. Just then, fingers slid along his hand before intertwining with his own. Kris smiled and pulled the smaller man to the surface. Yixing was indeed in his true form, ears winged and inhuman, his skin glistening an ethereal sheen. Kris reached out and cupped Yixing’s face, though the smaller man turned away. “Look at me.”

“No,” Yixing whispered. Kris couldn’t understand why Yixing was being so difficult. Kris turned Yixing’s face towards his with a hand under the other man’s chin. Yixing shook his head and closed his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Kris asked. He was suddenly worried that maybe last night wasn’t as magical for Yixing as it had been for him. He worried that maybe Yixing regretted it or hated it and he couldn’t face Kris in the morning after.

“What if you don’t love me like this?” Yixing mumbled. Kris cracked a smile at that. He pulled Yixing closer to him, though Yixing kept his head down. Kris felt Yixing’s skin press against him, but also the slick scales of Yixing’s lower half.

“Have you forgotten that the first time I ever saw you was like this?” Kris asked. He wrapped his arms around Yixing, running his hands down Yixing’s back to where skin transitioned to scales. Yixing drew in a breath and looked up at Kris in surprise. Looking deeper, Kris saw fear in his eyes too. Kris moved his hands lower so that his hands slid over Yixing’s tail to rest just below his hips. “I thought you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen when you were tied up in that net. Like this.”

Yixing smiled, revealing sharp and inhumanly pointed teeth. Kris smiled at seeing them before leaning over and kissing Yixing. Yixing kissed him back happily, even throwing his arms around Kris’s neck to ensure that Kris didn’t pull away too soon. When they finally did part, Kris playfully splashed water in Yixing’s face. Yixing laughed and it began a childish water fight that lasted the whole day until Kris and Yixing got back to shore and made love again.

 

"Can I ask you a question?" Kris asked as he continued cooking the fish over the fire. Yixing had happily swam out into the water to catch whatever fish he could. He'd look so cute when he'd proudly shown off his catch and even cuter when he frowned at seeing Kris begin to cook the fish. According to Yixing, it tasted better raw.

"Yes," Yixing answered as he laid out in the sand beside Kris. He rested his head in Kris’s lap and stared up at his lover. Kris smiled down at Yixing.

“How in the world did you get caught by that net?” Yixing bit his lip and turned his face away so that Kris couldn’t read his expression. He knew that Kris was referring to that night when he was captured by the ship, when he’d been tangled in the net and brought on board. That was the night that Kris claimed to have truly fallen in love with Yixing.

“I had been occupied,” Yixing said. Kris raised an eyebrow.

“Doing what?” Yixing turned back to Kris with an embarrassed look on his face.

“I was actually trying to rescue some fish that had gotten caught in the net. I freed them, but the storm had seemed to only tighten me in the net.” He bit his lip again, and Kris couldn’t stop himself from laughing out loud. Yixing quickly released his lip so he could pout at Kris. This only made Kris laugh harder. When he finally calmed down, he could only think of one thing to say.

“Yixing, that is the cutest story ever.”

“It nearly got me killed, or worse, so don’t laugh.” Kris smiled.

“I would never have let that happen,” Kris said with a smile. Yixing smiled too before he sat up to kiss Kris. Yixing threw his arms around Kris’s neck during the kiss and his fingers found themselves brushing over the raised scar that resided there, leaving Yixing to ask a question himself.

“Where did the scars come from?” Yixing asked when he pulled back from their kiss. The smile fell from Kris’s face and he leaned forward to bury his face in Yixing’s hair. Yixing could tell what Kris’s hesitation meant. “Are they because of me?”

“I made a choice and my punishment had nothing to do with you,” Kris told the merman.

“How can you say that? If you wouldn’t have helped me, then you never would have been hurt.”

“I helped you because I wanted to. I got hurt because I saved someone precious to me. I would do it over again if it meant protecting you.” Yixing shook his head before he tightened his hold on Kris, nearly crushing the sailor against him.

“Let me protect you then,” Yixing said. Kris playfully hit Yixing on the head before he smiled at the merman.

“You already did, remember?” Yixing shook his head.

“Forever. I never want you to ever hurt again.” Kris smiled fondly at Yixing.

“Stay by my side and I never will.”

 

Yixing ran his fingers over the raised scars on Kris’s back. Kris was laying on his side and Yixing was laying facing his back. Kris had fallen asleep shortly after he and Yixing had finished making love. Yixing had lost count of how many times it had happened already. It had been nearly a week since the first time and Yixing was pretty sure that he himself was insatiable. Maybe it was that he felt like he had two years to make up for. Or maybe it was that he wasn’t sure for how much longer he was going to be able to stay by Kris’s side, so he wanted to ensure that he took advantage of every second.

It scared Yixing that he couldn’t be sure of the future. In his colony under the waves, the days to come were planned out far in advance and he had never any question as to what would happen to him. But all that had changed and now suddenly Yixing’s own future had little to do with him and everything to do with a sailor. It was terrifying to see where they would be led and how their lives would intertwine.

Yixing leaned forward and kissed the scars on his lover’s back. Kris twitched at the sensation, but he didn’t seem to wake up. Yixing smiled to himself before he leaned forward and kissed the scars again. Then again and again until he had kissed every single scar more than once.

“What are you doing?” Kris asked just as Yixing was leaning forward for another round of kisses. Yixing smiled before leaning over so he could look into Kris’s face.

“I knew you were awake.”

“Of course but I didn’t want you to stop.” Yixing smiled even wider before leaning over to kiss the scars at the top of Kris’s neck. Kris rolled onto his back and pulled Yixing down for a kiss on the lips. When he pulled back, he took note of the look on Yixing’s face. “You look sad. I told you not to worry about the scars.”

“What caused them?” Yixing asked. Kris reached up and grabbed Yixing’s face between his hands. “A whip? A cane? A knife? What did they do to you?”

“They punished me for a good deed.”

“Stop, Kris. Please give me a straight answer,” Yixing pleaded.

“They whipped me,” Kris admitted. Yixing looked pained at the thought of them taking a whip to Kris’s back.

“I’m so sorry.”

“Stop. I don’t want you to feel any regret.” Yixing’s eyes sparkled with tears.

“Did it hurt?” Kris nodded slowly. He knew that there was no point in lying. The scars spoke for themselves and he knew that his covering up the immense pain he’d felt back then would only cause Yixing to hurt more. Yixing opened his mouth, presumably to apologize again, but Kris silenced him with a kiss.

“Don’t worry about them anymore. It happened two years ago and I never even think about them anymore.”

“You’re a good man, Kris.” Kris smirked.

“Your opinion is the only one that matters to me.” Yixing leaned forward and smacked Kris playfully on the arm.

“How did this happen to us?” Yixing asked. Kris pulled Yixing down to lay directly on his chest before he closed his eyes. He seemed to be thinking to himself, maybe about his answer or maybe about nothing at all. Yixing wasn’t able to read his expression from the angle his head was laying at, so he just closed his own eyes and relaxed at the feeling of Kris’s chest moving up and down. Finally after several lengthy minutes, Kris answered.

“The sea is good to her loyal followers. Because we’ve both treated her well, she’d decided to bless us by giving us each other. We have her to thank for that storm that brought you on board the ship. We have her to thank for bringing the Black Pearl in contact with that pirate’s ship because I wouldn’t be here now without those currents. We’re together because we both belong to the sea.”

“And now we belong to one another,” Yixing said without opening his eyes.

 

The day that Kris spotted the navy schooner in the distance was the worst day of Yixing’s life. He was gathering firewood when he heard Kris begin to shout. He’d dropped everything and ran towards where Kris was tending to the current fire. Yixing was instantly worried that something was happening. His first thought was that his own people had come to retrieve him and were harming Kris. So he ran towards his lover. He needed to save him.

He’d stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Kris waving his hands in the air and, beyond him, the ship. Kris screamed one more time before he glanced over his shoulder at Yixing’s devastated face. Kris immediately turned around and moved towards Yixing, but Yixing merely took a step towards the water while shaking his head.

“Yixing,” Kris said. Yixing looked past him and watched as the ship changed direction and began heading towards their island.

“Is it one of yours?” Yixing asked in a small voice. Kris nodded slowly and Yixing had to look away to hold in his tears. It’s not like he was foolish. He knew that Kris would be rescued eventually, but he just wanted the day to never come. He wanted it to take a long time, not two weeks. He still wasn’t satisfied with their time together. There was so much he didn’t know about Kris and so much he hadn’t gotten to share.

“Come with me,” Kris said. Yixing looked up to see Kris standing only inches in front of him. Kris reached out and wiped away Yixing’s tears as they fell. He hated seeing Yixing cry, but he too foresaw this event and merely hoped that it wouldn’t occur for a while. Yixing didn’t try to stop his crying. He leaned forward and held onto Kris. “I’ll constantly be on the seas so you’ll never be far from your home.”

“I can’t,” Yixing choked out. Kris shook his head as if unaccepting of Yixing’s answer.

“I’ll protect you so you don’t have to worry.” Yixing shook his head.

“I do love you so much, but I’m still so afraid of your people. I don’t belong in your world.” Yixing stepped out of Kris’s embrace and wiped at his eyes. “I can’t follow you.” He turned and began running towards the water, but Kris grabbed his arm before he could change and swim away.

“You can’t just leave,” Kris said. “We’ve both waited two years for this, so you can’t just walk out of my life. What if I never see you again?”

“You will,” Yixing said. “You said it before that the sea brought us together. Well she’ll do it again, I just know it. We’ll be together again.”

“When? Two years from now? Five? Ten?” More tears fell from Yixing’s eyes and he stood on his tiptoes to kiss Kris quickly on the lips. It was like the last time they had parted. A quick kiss from Yixing and then he’d be gone. Kris couldn’t let that happen, so he crushed Yixing against him and kissed him ferociously. “One more time,” Kris whispered when they parted.

Yixing nodded before he let Kris drag him down to the sand where they made love one last time. They clung to each other so desperately and Kris wasn't as gentle as he should have been. But Yixing didn't mind because he too was in a frenzy as his mind fought off the foreboding feeling while his body crumbled under the onslaught of pleasure. This was the last time for who knew how long and both of them were trying to sear the other's touch into their flesh.

Kris remained inside Yixing even after he came because he was too reluctant to separate, and Yixing didn't seem to be bothered by the discomfort under the circumstances. Finally Yixing watched the ship draw too near and he finally had to untangle himself from Kris. He kissed Kris on the lips for as long as he could before he made his way to the water. Kris refused to watch him leave but he punched his fist into the ground when he heard the splash behind him.

When a smaller ship came towards the small island, Kris had cried enough tears to completely soak his cheeks and shirt. Three men docked the small boat and ran towards him. He didn’t bother watching them approach and he merely glanced at them when they kneeled before him.

“Hey mate, where you come from?” One of them asked. Kris looked at the man who was talking to him. “We’re looking for a ship of ours that didn’t show up for a report. You know anything about that? A naval ship called the Black Pearl?” Kris nodded and the man looked behind him, as if trying to find some vestiges of the ship. “What happened, mate? Where’s the ship?”

“Pirates,” Kris whispered, his voice so harsh and scruffy from crying. The second man cursed. “I’m the only one left.”

“How the hell did you survive?” Kris’s eyes filled with more tears as he thought of his saving grace, of Yixing being the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes. He was only alive because an angel had saved him from drowning. Even then it was Yixing that helped him survive on that island. He survived because of Yixing and he’d never be able to explain that to anyone.

“We need to get you back to our headquarters. The Admiral will wanna talk to you about what happened,” the second man said. Kris covered his mouth and hunched over, more sobs wracking his body. The three men looked at each other. They most likely assumed that Kris having seen the ship go down was having an emotional toll on him. They could never guess that his tears were the result of losing the love of his life, possibly forever.

They helped Kris to his feet and over to the smaller boat that was waiting in the shallows. Kris barely registered any of it. He just kept crying, eyes trained on the small island where he’d held Yixing in his arms for the first time. The place where he’d pressed the smaller man into the sand, enveloping himself in everything that was Yixing.

Kris had plenty of scars on his back to speak for the first time he met Yixing. He had even more now that he’d had the chance to love Yixing the way he’d wanted. Except these scars weren’t on the surface.


	3. Slack Water (Five Years Later)

“Captain!”

Kris turned to see Chen running towards him. He’d sent Chen to count their supplies and take inventory of everything they’d need to get while they were stopped in port. It had been nearly two years since Kris was back in these waters, docking in these ports. His orders had taken him far from the mainland where people ate interesting foods and looking at his ships sails with looks of both interest and scorn.

“How’d we look?” Kris asked. Chen smiled.

“The only thing we’re in desperate need of is bread, but since we haven’t had that for months, I would say we’ve done a fantastic job.” Kris smiled at his First Mate, an often playful young man who Kris had picked up straight out of the naval academy. Kris had seen an eagerness to lead and a desire for travel in Chen’s eyes. It was mere months after his ship was finished and finally set sail that he designated Chen as his second in command.

Chen stretched his hands high over his head before walking to the edge of the deck. One could just make out the Southern port where, years ago, Kris had begun his own naval career at the hands of the Black Pearl and her captain. Now, after a year in the academy for proper training and years of pirate hunting, Kris was the captain of his own ship, the Sea Wolf. Notorious for it’s success and ferocity in battle, the Sea Wolf was the most feared ship on the seas, and Kris stood at it’s helm everyday.

“Excited to be home?” Kris asked. Chen turned to him and smiled. A shout at the far end of the deck, caught both of their attention. Kris sent Chen to investigate and he himself went into his quarter’s underneath the deck. The room was quite large with one bed, a desk, a dining set, and a drawer to hold belongings. Most of the furniture rocked with the ship but it was all sturdy enough not to cause a problem.

Kris sat down at his desk and opened up the top drawer. He didn’t bother with locks. The men on board his ship had enough respect for him not to go into his quarter’s without permission. Kris could be as private as he wanted to without worrying about someone finding out anything he didn’t want them too. Which he was so very thankful for.

He pulled out two letters, each one addressed to someone different. The first was addressed to a man he had not spoken to in almost ten years. He’d had no word from his father since he’d left for his voyage to the new world in the West, but Kris was certain that his naval connections could allow him to be contacted. So Kris had written his father a letter telling him all about his life in recent years. He started by telling him that he was now an accomplished naval captain with a beautiful ship and strong crew. He told him about all his praises and about all the places he had traveled. Later in the letter, he told his father about how he’d found love. He tried to be selective with his words about describing how he and Yixing had met. The letter could be read by anyone and he didn’t want to risk Yixing’s safety. But Kris wanted his father to know about how he had met his other half and he felt that they were destined to be together forever, even if they kept getting separated.

The second letter was addressed to Yixing himself. To be honest, Kris wasn’t sure if Yixing could read but he was certain that Luhan could. His letter to Yixing was simple, small enough to fit inside a corked bottle that would be tossed into the ocean. He merely wanted to write Yixing and tell him that he was back in domestic waters, close to where they had met both times. He had no guarantee that the letter would reach Yixing aside from his faith that the sea would do her job and bring them once again, back together.

Kris reread both letters, ensuring that he was satisfied with both of their contents. Once he was done, Chen knocked on his door to tell him that they were ready to dock in port. Kris nodded to himself before folding up the letter to his father in an envelope which he gave to Chen with instructions to send it on it’s way. After Chen left, Kris rolled up Yixing’s letter and stuck it inside the bottle, corked it, and went to his large window at the back of his cabin. He said a small prayer to the sea before he hurled the message in a bottle as far out into the ocean as he could.

Then he waited.

Chen looked at him as he rearranged the items on his desk. All the other men had left the ship days ago, to sleep their nights beside good whores and in nice beds. Kris, however, had chosen to sleep all four nights on board the Sea Wolf, in his own stiff bed. Chen had reluctantly left the other nights, only after Kris insisted that he go enjoy his time on land while they were docked. What Chen was unaware of was that Kris stayed up late each night waiting for some sign that his merman had come back to him.

“Gonna stay on board tonight too?” Chen asked. Kris nodded.

“I’ve always felt more at home on rocking waters than on solid ground.” Chen smirked. “Go out and have some fun tonight.”

“When do you make your report?”

“Two days from now. Headquarters decided to give us some time off since we just got back after two years away at sea. Admiral also said that he’d try and position us someplace close by so we wouldn’t have to make another voyage like that.”

“Good man,” Chen said. He walked over to the porthole in the side of the captain’s quarters and looked out at the lights from the port city brightening the night sky. “You’re from around these parts, correct Captain?”

“Some towns over. A small village that I’m sure you’ve never heard the name of.”

“Do you ever go back?” Chen asked, glancing back at his captain. Kris shook his head with a nostalgic smile on his face.

“Nothing to go back to. Only ghosts reside there now.”

“Then what is it you do all this for?” Chen asked, waving his hand around to encompass the Captain’s quarters. He was asking what is Kris was working so hard for.

“To keep going out to sea. I do this so that I’m never far from where I belong.”

Kris glanced at his bed. It was getting late and he should get to sleep. He looked out the window one last time. Yet another day that Yixing had not shown. Kris knew that the likelihood that he would show was slim. The letter could have possibly never reached him, but Kris had to believe. If he didn’t, then what was there? If he had no faith in true love, then he might as well die now.

He thought he heard a sound and rushed to the window to see nothing but waves crashing against the hull of the ship. Kris closed his eyes and took a deep breath to calm himself. He just had to keep believing. For as long as it took.

Two days went by and still no sign of Yixing. They were scheduled to return to sea tomorrow though they’d be staying close to the mainland. The rest of the crew had already returned to the ship and were preparing to set sail again. Kris had spent the whole day relaying orders to the crew and making sure that they had everything they’d need for their voyage. By the time night fell and the whole crew went to eat dinner, Kris passed and went to his room to collapse on his bed.

His eyes weren’t closed for ten minutes before he heard a loud thunk. He sat up immediately and looked towards the door, thinking Chen or someone was knocking for entry. There was no other knock and no one entered the room. He looked around the room wondering if maybe something had fallen over. Upon seeing that everything was in it’s proper place, Kris climbed out of his bed slowly.

It couldn’t be.

He made his way to the window and peered out, searching the dark, brackish waters for a pale face and shaggy hair. The sea's surfacing was reflecting the moonlight making it hard to distinguish any disturbances or shadows beneath the water. But Kris thought he saw something move. There, just below where the light from his cabin bounced off the water.

Kris held his breath for a long time until finally the water rippled as the tip of a head appeared, then the whole head and neck revealing a shocked face with wide eyes and dangerous lips.

Yixing.

Kris wasn't breathing. Yixing was actually staring at him. Kris motioned towards the ladder and Yixing seemed to understand. He swam over to it and begin climbing up. Kris watched him and once Yixing was to the window, he hoisted the merman inside.

Yixing collapsed onto the ground as if his human legs weren't strong enough just then to support his weight. Kris kneeled beside him, mouth fumbling to produce words. Yixing shook his head before he pulled Kris's face towards his and kissed him. Kris immediately wrapped his arms around Yixing, his hands skimming over nude skin, and Yixing shivered in response.

“You got my letter,” Kris said when he pulled back. His face was only centimeters from Yixing and his eyes were closed as he savored the moment. Yixing was really here, as beautiful and soft and intoxicating as always.

“I love you, Kris. I always have, but I haven’t seen you in five years so can we save our reunion for afterwards.” Kris pulled back and looked at Yixing in confusion. Yixing kissed Kris again, his lips moving from Kris’s lips across his face to his ear. “I desperately need to feel you inside of me.”

Kris didn’t need for Yixing to drop him anymore hints. He grabbed Yixing and carried him over to the bed, where he settled the smaller man down before climbing practically on top of him. Yixing stopped him for one second to say that he loved Kris again. Kris could barely stop his heart from beating out of his chest. He knew Yixing loved him but it always made him flustered to hear it. So with all of his men eating below deck, Kris made love to Yixing with enough pleasure to make up for the past five years.

Kris brushed the sweat soaked hair off of Yixing’s forehead. Yixing was laying on his back and looking up at Kris was who sitting up in his bed. Yixing smiled before grabbing Kris’s hand and bringing it to his lips, kissing each knuckle. Kris leaned down and kissed Yixing’s lips. For the first hour they were together, they didn’t actually say anything. They merely took comfort in the fact that, after five years and so many lonely and heartbroken nights, they were finally together again. Neither one of them wanted to ruin that by saying something.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Yixing said. Kris laid down beside Yixing and placed his head in the space between Yixing’s shoulder and neck. Yixing kissed Kris’s hair and forehead. “I’m so sorry about leaving. I was just so afraid and I couldn’t get past what had happened to me. But I never should have left you.” Yixing blinked his eyes and Kris saw that he was blinking back his tears. “I missed you so much. There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t think about you. Your smile. The timbre of your voice. The feel of your skin. It’s been so long.”

“I know,” Kris said comfortingly. He kissed Yixing’s neck and gooseflesh immediately broke out along his skin. Yixing arched his neck in anticipation of more kisses. Even after five years, Yixing’s body responded instantaneously to Kris and his touch. Kris laughed and sat back up. Yixing looked at him perplexed. “You left. It happened, but your here with me now. And you never have to leave me again.” Yixing smiled.

“What about the ship?” Yixing asked, a slight hint of fear in his voice.

“I own it. I’m the captain and no one will do anything to you. They won’t even talk to you if I restrict it. You can be comfortable here. We’ll be at sea and I’ll make sure you have everything you want.”

“All I want is you,” Yixing said. Kris smiled.

“So you’ll stay?” Yixing hesitated for a brief second before he sat up and kissed Kris.

“I’ll stay with you forever.” Kris smiled again and Yixing dragged him back down to the bed.

Kris tried not to smile the entire day. They’d finally returned to sea and all the men were working on their respective jobs. He was standing on the upper deck with Chen and a few other men discussing the winds and currents. He’d been up late into the night with Yixing, making love over and over again until Kris was physically unable to. Yixing seemed like he was trying to make up for their time apart in just that one night. It had Kris worried at first but he seemed serious about staying. Yixing had actually talked about wanting to go on land with Kris one day. He was talking about this when he’d finally fallen asleep. He’d still been asleep, loose sheets draping his angelic frame like a world-class painting, when Kris had taken to the deck that morning.

“When do you think we’ll be back at port?” a man asked Chen. Chen turned to Kris to check on what orders he’d been given from headquarters.

“Most likely we won’t be back for at least a month, but we are on a much more flexible mission. First we need to head south where a few ships have reportedly gone missing. It’s most likely we’ll find pirates, but as soon as we take care of them we’ll head east for usual patrols.” The man smiled in obvious excitement before heading to the lower deck.

“Captain?”

“Hmm?”

“Why do you keep smiling?” Chen asked with a sly glimpse at Kris. Kris scowled in an attempt not to blush. Chen always was very perceptive.

“I’m just happy to have set sail again.” Chen raised an eyebrow. Kris looked away guiltily and Chen laughed.

“You took a woman to bed, didn’t you? You got off this boat and crawled right into bed with someone. I’m not sure when you got off, but I know that blush.”

“Not true,” Kris said. Chen narrowed his eyes as he thought about it. Kris coughed. “The reason I gave you is the correct one. You have no right to question me. I’m your captain.” Kris’s words weren’t harsh and Chen took them as a joke anyway. When he realized that Kris wasn’t gonna tell him the truth, Chen finally walked away. Kris breathed a sigh of relief that he wouldn’t have to explain his sexuality and lover to Chen quite yet. He still couldn’t even imagine how the crew would take the news that Kris’s lover was a man...or well merman.

He assumed he could start by just telling Chen. He hoped Yixing would be okay with that.

Kris walked through the door of his cabin and was nearly assaulted by Yixing. Yixing pushed him against the door and kissed him. Kris smiled into the kiss. He'd been thinking of Yixing all day, of just laying beside Yixing and talking to him about nothing and about everything. Of course, he'd hoped they would do some kissing too. Yixing's kisses were intoxicating like that.

"You were out there all day," Yixing said. "I thought about going out to find you, but I didn't want to cause trouble or get in the way, so I thought I'd wait."

"I'm sorry that I didn't wake you up and tell you where I was going. You were just sleeping so well and I thought that you might need the sleep after last night." Yixing smiled before he kissed Kris again. Kris finally had to push Yixing away so he could deliver his news. “Listen, Yixing, I have something to tell you and I doubt you’ll be pleased to hear it.” Yixing pressed himself against Kris and Kris took a deep breath when he saw Yixing’s bare skin on full display.

“I don’t want bad news just yet,” Yixing said. Kris fought to tear his eyes away from Yixing’s body.

“I’m afraid it really can’t wait.” Yixing smiled and nodded, stepping back so Kris could stay focused. “I can’t keep you hidden on this ship for long.” Yixing’s eyebrows immediately pulled down and Kris rushed to reassure him. “I can protect you. I own this ship and the loyalty of the men on board it. Which means that I can’t betray their trust by keeping you a secret. We’ll be at sea for a month, maybe more, and there is no possible way that I can keep you from being discovered for that length of time. So it’s better that they find out about us from my own mouth early on, than by who knows how later. I know that you--”

“It’s fine,” Yixing said.

“What?” Yixing reached up and cupped Kris’s face.

“I didn’t swim all the way here to be frightened away by men who have no power over my fear.” Kris gave Yixing a puzzled look and Yixing stepped away from him, making his way over to the bed to sit down. Kris continued watching him, watching the way a flicker of several emotions crossed his lover’s face before Yixing met his gaze.

“You’ve changed,” Kris said as he made his way to sit beside Yixing.

“I’ve had to,” Yixing said. "I’m no longer in a position to be ruled by fear and to live as if there is nothing worth seeing above the waves. My people suffered a change and we had to adapt.”

“What happened?” Yixing turned to Kris with a smile before he ran his fingers over Kris’s lips.

“Unlike you, I risk no one’s trust by keeping my secrets but rather by spilling them.” Kris grabbed Yixing’s hand and held it between both of his. Yixing was most certainly keeping something from him, but Kris feared that pushing for that secret would only distance Yixing from him. Yixing would tell him in time and Kris just had to wait it out. They had forever and he could have patience.

“I’m glad you aren’t afraid anymore,” Kris said before leaning over and kissing Yixing’s forehead. “Hopefully that’ll make introducing you to my men easier. I’d like to introduce you to my second-in-command, Chen. He’s the absolute best and he’ll be a better captain than me one day.”

“No one will be better than you,” Yixing said. Kris laughed.

“I appreciate your praise.” Yixing raised an eyebrow.

“I can praise you more if that’s what you like.” Kris smiled wide and Yixing wrapped his arms around Kris’s neck. Kris let Yixing pull him down and there was a word of praise constantly waiting behind Yixing’s lips every time their mouths parted.

Yixing sat in the chair by the desk as Kris wiped down his body with a wet rag. Yixing was covered in sweat and sea water and other things. Not that he really believed he'd ever wash the sea from Yixing's skin. Kris watched as Yixing's skin shimmered wherever the rag touched, glistening as if it were the water catching the light and reflecting it back in a million colors. Kris mentioned this to Yixing and Yixing only shrugged.

"I don't know why it does that. Maybe our skin has become water." Yixing chuckled and Kris maneuvered so he could kiss Yixing just below his ear.

"You remind me so much of the sea," Kris admitted. "The white of your skin reminds me of waves when they break. The sound of your voice like wind colliding with smooth water. The roll of your hips like the rocking waves after a tumultuous storm."

"You're poetic for a sailor," Yixing said with a smile as he stood up. Kris threw the sullied rag to the side, replacing the swipe of cloth with his hands.

"I just love the sea." Kris wrapped his hands around Yixing's midsection and Yixing leaned back against him.

"Tell me more." Kris placed his lips to Yixing's ear.

"I'm drowning, surrounded by smooth water." Here Kris ran one hand down Yixing's arm and then his thigh. "I can feel it filling me." Kris pressed his hand against the bottom of Yixing's torso, pushing the smaller man's hips into Kris's. "I would do anything to let it take me completely."

"Anything?" Yixing moaned as Kris started rocking his hips into Yixing's.

"All you have to do is ask and I will obey." Yixing opened his mouth, either to respond or moan out again, Kris didn't know, when a knock on the door interrupted them. Kris and Yixing instantly separated, both breathing heavily. So much for cleaning themselves off.

"Who is it?" Kris called out.

"Me, Captain." Kris sighed in relief that it was Chen. "You didn't come to dinner so I was worried that you might not have been feeling well. Are you okay?"

"One second." Kris turned to Yixing and dropped his voice. "Remember me telling you I wanted you to meet Chen? Are you still willing to go through with it?" Yixing nodded slowly. "Good because it's happening now."

Kris made his way over to the door and opened it to find Chen in his usual attire, staring at his shoes. Chen glanced up and raised an eyebrow at Kris’s half naked body. Kris cleared his throat and Chen shrugged.

“Were you sleeping?” Chen asked. Kris shook his head.

“Um, no, but I actually do need to talk to you, Chen. Would you mind coming in?” Chen seemed surprised. In the years that he had been with Kris, he’d only been in the Captain’s chambers a few times.

“‘Course, Captain.” Kris stepped aside and Chen followed him inside. Chen started speaking to Kris, telling him about the cook’s dinner but when he turned to face the Captain, his mouth stopped making sounds. Yixing stood a few feet behind Kris, one of Kris’s discarded jackets in his arms to cover the majority of his body. Chen looked at Yixing and then at Kris and then at Yixing again.

“Chen, I’d like you to meet Yixing.” Chen looked at Yixing’s bare legs and shoulders before looking back at Kris. He shook his head slightly to ask the question he wanted to know. “Yes,” Kris said. “Yixing is my lover, has been for quite some many years. We’ve recently been reunited and I couldn’t miss the opportunity to catch up on our lost time together.” Kris saw the odd look on Chen’s face. “Does it bother you?”

“What?”

“That I have more feeling for a man’s cock than I do for a woman’s breast.” Chen shook his head.

“Male relations aren’t all that uncommon,” Chen said. “I’m just curious why you never told me about him. All these years that I’ve been by your side and I never would have guessed that such a beautiful man would be interested in you.” Chen smiled and Kris relaxed because that smile meant that Chen was okay with Kris’s choice in lover. He accepted how Kris felt for Yixing, and that was a huge relief for Kris.

“Do you think the men will mind?” Chen shook his head again.

“You are our Captain and we all have great respect for you. You’ve saved our lives more than once, and I doubt a single man on this ship will care that you share your nights beside a man.”

“Thank you,” Kris told him. Chen shrugged. Kris glanced back at Yixing who was keeping his eyes trained on Chen. Finally he turned to look at Kris and Yixing motioned towards Chen with his eyes. Kris took a deep breath. “But that isn’t actually all that I had wanted to talk with you about.”

Kris walked over to where he had thrown aside the rag from earlier, picked it up and motioned for Yixing to hold out his arm. When he was sure that Chen was watching, albeit with a very confused look on his face, Kris wiped the now damp rag across Yixing’s skin. It shimmered etherally as it did whenever it seemed to come in contact with water and Kris heard Chen suck in a breath.

“He’s not a man, not like we are.” Kris motioned towards the bay window at the back of his quarters. “And he looks very different if you were to see him out there.” Chen’s eyes went wide as he understood what Kris was saying.

“Merfolk,” Chen whispered. Kris nodded and he slipped an arm around Yixing. “I’ve never seen one before.”

“I’m likely the only one you’ll ever see,” Yixing said. “My people rarely find the desire to come near you humans.” Chen nodded his head slowly.

“How did you two meet?” Chen asked. Yixing opened his mouth to answer but Kris tightened his grip on Yixing.

“I saved him from a horrible fate and then he repaid the favor. I’d like to keep the details between us, so long as it doesn’t insult you.”

“‘Course not, Captain.”

“There is a reason that I wanted you to know about what Yixing really is. On board this ship, we meet our fair share of accidents, misfortunes, and battles. The likelihood of something happening to me is high. I need you to protect him, Chen.” Yixing turned to give Kris a confused look.

“You’re gonna protect me,” Yixing said. Kris smiled at him.

“If something were to happen to me, be it death or mutiny or anything, I want you to make sure that Yixing gets off this ship discretely. You can’t let anyone see him in his true form or let anyone see where he escapes to. Do you understand that, Chen?” Chen nodded, a bow and salute following shortly behind. He’d been speaking to his friend earlier, but now he was being given an order from his Captain.

“I’ll make sure that Yixing’s safety is my top priority.”

“I plan to tell the men about Yixing’s role as my lover soon, but until then please keep it a secret. I also don’t want them to know that Yixing is a merman, so take that secret to your grave.” Chen nodded again.

“You can trust me, Captain.” Kris smiled.

“I know I can. That’s why I’m trusting you with Yixing’s life, which I consider far more precious than my own.” Chen bowed again to Kris and made his way to the door, assuming that Kris was done with him. Once he grabbed the door handle, Kris stopped him. “I have one more favor to ask.”

“Some needy,” Chen said with a smile.

“Yixing doesn’t have any clothes and I’d rather him not be nude when he meets the rest of the crew. I’d love to see him in my own clothes but they are far too big for him. You two are similar in size, so if you wouldn’t mind loaning him some clothing, I would appreciate it. I’ll buy you both more when he reach port.”

Chen looked at Yixing, trying to decide which clothes would fit him best. Yixing looked him up and down too, trying to assess the friendship between his lover and this new face before him. Finally Kris dismissed Chen to go fetch Yixing some clothes, and the two were alone again.

“Are you okay?” Kris asked Yixing. Yixing sat down in the chair at Kris’s desk. Yixing shrugged.

“I think so. It just scares me that you were talking about if something happened to you.” Kris kneeled beside Yixing and took his hand.

“Agreeing to Captain this ship meant that I was always aware of the risks. You need to be aware of them too. We’re pirate hunters. We engage in naval battles frequently and, though we’ve been successful so far, there is always a chance that something might happen. I need you to understand that if the ship goes down you need to only focus on getting away. No saving me this time, okay?”

“The Captain goes down with his ship.”

“Exactly,” Kris said with a smile.

“Then you better keep winning, Captain.”

“Come here,” Kris said with a laugh. Yixing was trying to dress himself in the clothes Chen had brought, but he was doing a very poor job. Despite having learned a lot about humankind, simple motions like eating with a fork and buttoning up a shirt seemed lost on him.

Yixing made his way over to Kris and Kris did the first three buttons on Yixing’s shirt. He told Yixing how to hold the shirt and let him do the rest. Yixing smiled to himself when he finished buttoning up the shirt. Kris looked down at where Yixing’s lower half was still completely nude.

“Let’s try tying up your pants,” Kris said as he grabbed the pants. He kneeled down and held the pants for Yixing to step into, one pale leg at a time. Then Kris pulled the pants up, coming face to face with Yixing’s crotch. Yixing reached down and ran his fingers through Kris’s hair. Kris smiled and laced up Yixing’s pants, voicing all of the motions and how-to’s out loud for Yixing to learn. They wouldn’t get very far if Kris tore Yixing’s clothes off of him the second Yixing got in them.

"I don't intend to stay in them for long," Yixing said. Kris glanced down again at the bit of Yixing in front of him before he met the other man's eyes.

"I want you to get used to wearing them. You'll want to be comfortable when you are on deck with me." Yixing nodded.

"We aren't on deck now," he said. Kris took a deep breath.

"No we aren't," Kris said as he started untying the pants he'd just put on his lover. He yanked them down and pushed Yixing back against the desk. In all the times they'd made love, Kris had never been quite confident enough in his skills to pleasure Yixing with his mouth. He was suddenly very eager to try.

“You sure you wanna do this now?” Kris asked Yixing, who was slipping on his clothes. “We can wait a few more days. I don’t want you to feel pressured to do this right now.”

“I kinda just wanna get it over with. The longer I wait, the worse it’ll be to deal with.” Yixing was right. He’d been on the ship for a week and a half and waiting any longer could make it slightly worse.

“Okay well I’ll tell the men about you and then I’ll bring you out. Is that okay?” Yixing shook his head.

“What if they don’t like me?” Yixing asked. Kris raised an eyebrow. Yixing actually worried that a bunch of sailors wouldn’t like him.

“They have no reason not to love you. I love you, and they will too.” Kris kissed Yixing’s forehead. “But I do have to warn you that once the men find out you’re my lover, they’ll most likely be rather annoying about it.”

Kris nodded to Chen, who called the men to attention. Nearly 60 heads turned to look at their Captain standing on the quarterdeck. Kris cleared his throat. Exactly how he should explain to the men that he was keeping a secret lover on board was something Kris was coming up with as he went.

“I have something I want all of you to know,” Kris started. He looked each of his men in the eye, hoping that they would be okay with his choice of lover as Chen had said they would be. “Ever since we set sail from the last port, I have been hiding something from you all.” A few people murmured, curious if it was about a change in the mission or maybe crew changes. “When we were last docked, I was acquainted with someone I once knew, a lover actually, and I was unable to part with them after being separated for many years. I’m sorry that I didn’t not tell you all before but I--”

“Captain?” one of the men asked. Kris looked at the man who had spoken, a young navigator by the name of Baekhyun, who was smiling. “I don’t mean to interrupt you, but everyone on this ship already knows that your keeping a lover in your room.” Kris turned to Chen with a look of disbelief that Chen would spill his secret despite being ordered not to.

“I didn’t tell them,” Chen said with a smile. “They found out all on their own.” Kris turned back to his men. He opened his mouth once and then closed it.

“You walk around with a dumb smile on your face,” Baekhyun said.

“Plus,” the tall sailor named Chanyeol who manned the crow’s nest added, “we can hear you.” Kris felt the color drain from his face.

“What?” he asked. Chen laughed.

“Only planks of wood to separate your quarters from the rest of the ship,” Baekhyun said. “We didn’t want to embarrass you, so we didn’t say anything.”

“Thanks,” Kris deadpanned.

“So we gonna get to meet her?” the cook, Kyungsoo, asked. Kris shook his head.

“Yes.” Kris walked down the stairs of the upper deck and straight to his cabin door. He knocked to let Yixing know that the time had come before he opened up the door. Everyone was looking in his direction and Kris a cacophony of different sounds when everyone caught the first glimpse of Yixing as he stepped out of the room. Some people drew in a breathe, some mumbled, one guy whistled, and some stayed completely quiet. “Men, this is Yixing.”

Yixing’s eyes scanned the faces of all of the men. They were all staring at him curiously. He was in Chen’s clothes which did fit him really well and he seemed more uncomfortable than he’d thought he’d be. Kris reached out and intertwined their fingers, trying to reassure Yixing that everything was okay.

“Captain,” Baekhyun said. “He’s way too pretty for you.” Chen could be heard laughing his ass off on the quarterdeck. The men all started agreeing to the statement and Kris barked at them to all get back to work. Though they were still to interested in Yixing.

“Yixing, you should hang out with me in the crow’s nest today,” Chanyeol said. “You can see the whole ocean up there.”

“No way. Come with me to the kitchen,” Kyungsoo said, elbowing Chanyeol when he protested at Kyungsoo trying to steal Yixing. “I’d like to know what kinds of foods you like so I can cook you something tonight at dinner. Besides Chanyeol will annoy you if you spend the whole day up there with him.” Yixing looked at Kris as if asking his lover to save him.

“I think Yixing is just gonna stay with me today,” Kris told his crew and Chanyeol actually pouted. “Now seriously get back to work.” The men all grumbled, said their welcomes to Yixing, and went back to work. Kris made his way back to the quarterdeck and Yixing was right behind him. Yixing gasped and ran immediately to the railing when he got there.

“The view is so much better up here,” Yixing said, looking at the expanse of the ocean in front of him, the wind whipping his hair around. Kris watched the smile spread over Yixing’s face. The view was amazing and Yixing was staring so longingly at the water. Kris frowned. The only reason Yixing wasn’t swimming through those waters freely was because he wanted to be with Kris, limiting him to being on land.

Kris walked beside Yixing and placed his hand over his lover’s on top of the railing. Yixing looked at him and Kris squeezed his hand. “I’m sorry,” Kris whispered. “I wish we could be together in your home rather than mine.” Yixing shook his head.

“I’m here because I want to be.” Yixing stood up to kiss Kris. They heard someone whistle and Kris pulled back with a blush. “You are home to me, Kris.”

Yixing sat beside Kris that night at dinner. The room used for dinner was below deck and not very big. It had two long tables that all the men squeezed onto and one door that Yixing assumed connected to the kitchen. Yixing was sitting on the end of the table with only Kris sitting next to him, which made him happy because he wasn’t quite ready to be very close with the rest of the humans. The meal was mostly cooked fish, semi-stale bread, and slices of cheese. Yixing heard some of the men complaining but he thought it was very good. The cook saw him eating and smiled. Kris spent his whole meal speaking with the men around him, though his left hand never left where it rested around Yixing’s waist.

When the meal was done, Kris excused he and Yixing. They were alone for their walk back to Kris’s quarters. Yixing stopped, this time to see the moonlight reflecting off of the water’s surface. Kris wrapped his arms around Yixing, crushing him between Kris and the railing.

“I don’t get to see this side of the water. It’s beautiful.” Kris nodded.

“We used to leave our windows open in our house when I was a child. I was able to see this from my where I slept every night.” That was certainly true and he while his mother was dying, the view from his window was the only thing that could soothe him to sleep.

Yixing leaned back against Kris, and Kris just held him, both completely comfortable to just stand there in the moonlight. Kris was so caught up in memories of his past that he didn’t know Yixing was staring at him. Yixing’s bottom lip was between his teeth and he seemed to want to say something. His expression was pained and yet so wistful. As soon as Yixing opened his mouth to say whatever it was that was paining him, Kris leaned forward and buried his face in Yixing’s hair, oblivious to Yixing’s current state.

“Kris--”

“Sorry,” Kris whispered, his breath ruffling Yixing’s hair. “I didn’t mean to zone out, but I got caught up in my memories and they didn’t seem to want to let me go.” Yixing reached behind him to smoothe down Kris’s hair. When his fingers reached the collar of Kris’s shirt, the texture of his skin changed suddenly, becoming softer and rippled. Yixing stopped moving his fingers.

“You can barely feel them anymore,” Yixing said. Kris removed Yixing’s hand from the back of his neck and straightened out so he could face Yixing.

“They’re still very visible, I promise. They do seem to be fading with time, though. Maybe one day they’ll be completely gone.” Yixing turned in Kris’s arms so he could wrap his arm around Kris’s neck.

“I’ll be here to feel them everyday until they are.” Kris smiled before kissed Yixing, a kiss that lasted all the way back to the Captain’s quarters.

“Yixing,” Kris said sternly. “You have to tell me something. You’ve been on this ship a month and I don’t know a damn thing about what’s been going on with you.” Yixing refused to meet his eyes. Kris was right. In the last month that Yixing had been on board the ship with Kris, Kris had told Yixing about nearly everyday of the last five years. He told Yixing about going through the naval academy, of building his own ship once he found out he’d be a captain. He’d also tried constantly to get Yixing to tell him about what he’d been doing for the last five years, but Yixing had only told him that he couldn’t say. “Tell me something. The more you keep from me, the more distance that still remains between us.”

“I can’t,” Yixing said for the nth time that month. Kris walked over to Yixing and grabbed his lover’s face, forcing Yixing to look at him. Yixing put his hands on Kris’s shoulder as if to push the taller man away, but he made no motion to do so. “Can’t you just leave that part of my life beneath the waves? I’m here to be with you, so please don’t ask me any more questions.”

“How is that fair?” Kris asked. “You can learn everything about my people but I can’t learn a damn thing about yours.”

“Because my people would never harm yours,” Yixing said. Kris sucked in a deep breath.

“Yixing, I would never do anything to harm you or your people. I just want to understand the world you come from. The only reason I want to learn about your people is so I can become closer to you, so that you won’t feel so far away from home.” Yixing pulled his face from Kris’s grip.

“Stop asking, please.” Yixing squeezed Kris’s shoulders. “Just accept that you can never know about my people, about that part of me.” Kris stepped away and Yixing could tell that he was actually quite hurt.

“Doesn’t leave me with much, does it?” Kris asked. “I only have you in these little bits of my life and I’m left to fill in the holes myself.” Kris saw tears brimming in Yixing’s eyes. Kris opened his mouth at the hurt look on Yixing’s face

“They’re little to you?” Yixing asked.

“I didn’t mean it that way, Yixing. I’m just frustrated. You know everything about me, and the only thing I know about you is that you’re a merman and you have a friend named Luhan.” Yixing took a deep breath and turned away so he could wipe at his eyes. Kris felt terrible for getting angry. It was frustrating, but given what Yixing had been through, he should never have pushed.

“I’m sorry,” Kris said. He walked up and slipped his arms around Yixing’s waist. “It was never my intention to make you cry and I hate myself right now for doing it.” Kris squeezed Yixing against him, trying to emphasize his words. “If you really are worried that telling me will place your people in danger, then I would much rather you keep me in the dark. I mean that.”

“Thank you,” Yixing said. He leaned his head against Kris’s chest. “But you are right. There are some things that I’m keeping from you because it’s easier on me. Less painful for me to just keep my secrets to myself.”

“As long as you’re by my side, I won’t ask for more. I’m appreciative of you just being here. I don’t want to push you away from me.” He kissed Yixing’s forehead. “Maybe I’ll learn all your secrets on my deathbed,” Kris said jokingly. Yixing’s eyes got wide.

“Please don’t talk about you dying.” Kris raised an eyebrow. Something about the scared tone of his voice made Kris question if Yixing was bracing himself for having to watch Kris die.

“Are you going to outlive me?” Yixing glanced at him before nodding. “By how long?”

“A couple hundred years,” Yixing said. Kris was shaken by that. He should have guessed that Yixing’s longevity was different from his own, but hearing that Yixing would live hundred of years after his death really rocked him to the core.

“How old are you?” Kris asked. Yixing bit his lip, as if wondering if he should answer that question.

“A hundred and fifty-four,” Yixing said. Kris’s jaw actually dropped. Yixing looked around his age, even slightly younger. Kris would never have guessed that Yixing was nearly four times his age. “I’m pretty young, too. Only about a fourth of the way through my life.” Kris grabbed Yixing’s chin and rubbed his thumb over Yixing’s bottom lip.

“You’re still very beautiful for a hundred and fifty.”

“Four,” Yixing said with a chuckle. “A hundred and fifty-four.” Kris leaned over and kissed Yixing. When they pulled back, they were mere inches apart. “Let’s never fight again.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Kris said with a smile.

Even after Kris was breathing evenly with sleep, Yixing was restless. He kept looking out the window and thinking about the argument he’d had with Kris. He’d been so tight lipped since he’d gotten on the ship. Part of it was because he was truly afraid that he anything he revealed would be used against his people. Another part was because he was scared of how Kris would react to some of the information. He wasn’t even sure if Kris was okay with the truth about his age.

Yixing turned to look at Kris’s sleeping face. There were many parts about Kris that Yixing had fallen in love with.  Physically, he was beautiful. He was tall, broad-shouldered, and strong. His hands always made Yixing feel relaxed and reassured, and what he had hidden beneath his clothes made Yixing swoon. However, it was that gentle face that Yixing loved the most. When Kris was unaware of it, his face could seem tense and angry. But when Kris smiled or laughed, it was like seeing the sunshine for the first time. His sleeping face was like that too, peaceful and comforting. Yixing was sure he could wake up to that face for a million mornings and it would still take his breath away.

Yixing wrapped his arms even tighter around Kris’s torso, burying his face in Kris’s naked chest. He felt Kris’s arms tighten around him. He’d fallen in love with so many things about Kris. The fact that he was so gentle and loving made Yixing feel like the luckiest person on the planet, on land or off. Kris’s undeniable loyalty to the sea made Yixing feel like he’d found someone who would treat him like the most valuable jewel to ever have been found. His desire to please Yixing and the fact that he always seemed to know how made Yixing feel like he’d found his other half. Yixing had fallen so hard in love for Kris and he no regrets about it.

Kris had been so good to him and Yixing was repaying that with secrecy and a wall between them.

“Kris,” Yixing whispered. Yixing shook Kris gently, trying to wake him up. Kris made a grunting sound as if trying to say that he was awake. Yixing tried shaking him again and this time Kris barely opened his eyes. He saw Yixing’s face looking up at him and he smiled before tightening his arms more. “Kris?”

“Hmm?”

“Ask me any five questions and I’ll answer them.” Kris’s eyebrows pulled down and he finally opened his eyes to look at Yixing.

“What?” Yixing grabbed his face.

“I want you to know me. I do. So even though it isn’t much, I’ll answer any five questions you have.” Kris sat up on one elbow to look down at Yixing, who reached up and brushed Kris’s hair away from his face.

“Did you get in trouble for staying with me last time? On the island?” Yixing nodded slowly.

“I was punished for being with you. Not physically but I was restricted and forbidden from leaving our city, which is torture for someone who had the whole sea to swim in. It was worth it though. I got to make love to you on that beach and that meant more to me than my freedom for a few years.”

“A few years?” Yixing shrugged. “So that’s what you’ve been doing all this time.” Another thought occurred to Kris. “But I thought Luhan spent time on land with that one guy all the time.”

“That’s a special case,” Yixing said. “Luhan and Jongin are half-brothers.”

“What?” Kris asked completely surprised. Yixing nodded.

“Luhan’s mother left our people for some human man a long time ago. No one knew they had kids until Luhan did some research and found out that he had a brother. Jongin’s technically one of us and he could live amongst us, but he keeps refusing Luhan’s offer to do so. Instead Luhan lives with him for a month or so of the year, learning what he can in the hopes that it can benefit our people.” Kris tried to wrap his mind around that information. “It’s also the reason he didn’t we me to love you. Because he felt like I might leave him too.”

“Did that count as a question?” Kris asked as he propped up his head on his hand. Yixing intertwined Kris’s free hand with his own, knotting their fingers together.

“Three more to go.”

“You said you were punished. By whom?”

“The council of elders,” Yixing said. “They’re the ones who handle rule enforcement and discipline.”

“Who handles everything else?” Kris asked. He noticed Yixing gulp.

“The king.”

“Why did you react that way?”

“Do you really want to waste your last question on that?” Yixing asked. Kris drew in a deep breath before exhaling slowly. As suspicious as Yixing was regarding that last question, he was right. Kris wanted to think about what it was that he wanted to know the most before he wasted his last question.

“No. I wanna save it. When I think of what I want to know, I’ll ask you.” Yixing nodded. Suddenly he was struck with something he would like to know the answer to though it had nothing to do with the merfolk. “Yixing, would you like to fuck me?”

“I thought we were already doing that,” Yixing said. He seemed to be missing Kris’s real question.

“I mean would you like to do to me what I do to you?” Yixing’s eyes went wide as he understood what Kris was asking.

“I don’t know. Can I think about it?” Kris nodded slowly. “Is that what you want?” Kris nodded again.

“I know you enjoy having me inside of you. I want to experience that.”

“Will you be angry if I decide that I don’t want that?” Kris smiled.

“Of course not.” Kris grabbed Yixing and pulled him close, pressing them together. “It just mean you’ll have to make it up to me.” Yixing laughed and Kris immediately leaned down for some kisses. Yixing was more than happy to let Kris have him anytime he wanted.

Kris stared at the sealed envelope in his hands. It had arrived that morning via a raven which the navy sometimes used to deliver important information to ships away at sea. It was addressed to him and Kris had an idea who it was from. Before he’d set out again, Kris had sent two letters himself. Yixing had returned to him as a product of his first letter. This one must be his reply to his second letter.

It had to be from his father.

“Open it,” Yixing whispered. Kris reached out and grabbed Yixing’s hands, squeezing it tightly. Then he slowly opened the letter and read what was inside. Yixing couldn’t read so he had no idea what the letter contained, but he watched as the hope and excitement seemed to fall right off of Kris’s face. When he was done reading the letter, the slip of paper fell from his hands. “What’s wrong?”

“My father,” Kris whispered. He turned to look at Yixing and Yixing drew in a breath when the first tears fell from Kris’s eyes. “My father’s dead, Xing.” Yixing immediately wrapped Kris in his arms, rubbing his back and trying to soothe him. “They said he’s been dead for years. He got sick and just died. Both my parents are dead. I never got to tell my father goodbye. He never got to hear about my travels, or my becoming Captain, or you. He never got to know that I fell in love, that I finally got to experience what he and my mother had.”

“He knows,” Yixing said, fighting to keep himself from crying. Kris just sobbed into Yixing’s chest harder and harder. Yixing wanted to cry at Kris’s loss, at his pain, but he knew that Kris needed him to be strong. Yixing just smoothed back Kris’s hair, giving him little kisses of reassurance to the temple. Eventually Kris’s stopped sobbing enough for Yixing to put him to bed. Yixing held him while Kris cried himself to sleep, his tears soaking the sheets and Yixing’s clothes.

Yixing got out of the bed to go locate Chen. He found Chen waiting just a few feet away from the door to the Captain’s quarters. Some of the other men where standing close by too. Yixing motioned them all away from Kris’s room and delivered the news to them. They all stood in silence for a few seconds in respect for Kris’s father, a man they never knew.

“We heard him crying,” Chen told Yixing once he’d ordered the men to get back to work. “We thought that it actually had to do with you, that you were gonna leave him. Some of the men were getting upset, but I’m glad it’s not you.”

“His father’s dead,” Yixing said, not understanding why that was better.

“Kris hasn’t seen his father in almost ten years. He’s had a long time to dull his feelings for that man. I can’t imagine his pain if he lost you.” Yixing opened his mouth to try and argue that but he felt like he had bigger things to take care of. Chen took over the ship’s command for the rest of the day and the next four days after that.

Kris cried whenever he was awake for the first few days. Then he couldn’t cry anymore and he resorted to staring at the walls until he fell asleep. Yixing was worried because Kris wouldn’t eat, even when Yixing begged him too. He was coping and Yixing was trying to respect that but he seemed to have shut down.

“Please eat,” Yixing said, sitting on the edge of the bed. Kris didn’t even look at him and Yixing took a deep breath. “If you’re gonna insist on killing yourself, then I’m gonna jump back into that ocean. If I do that, then I’m not returning.”

Kris finally looked at him, eyes hurt. He didn’t to threaten that but Kris was giving him no choice. Kris finally sat up and downed the food that Chen had brought earlier that day. Yixing could tell he was forcing it down, but at least he was swallowing it. Once he was done, he laid back down in his bed. Yixing laid down too, wrapping his arms around Kris.

“Your father was proud of you even if he never got to hear about every wonderful thing you’ve done. I promise he was beaming with pride the day you were born and he never stopped feeling that. He’s with your mother now and that is nothing to mourn.” Kris turned to face Yixing, tears stinging his eyes.

“I always had this dream,” Kris said, having to stop as he fought back more tears. Yixing reached up and wiped away Kris’s tears with his thumbs. “I used to imagine that he and I would do this together one day. I only learned how to do this from him, my passion comes from him, and I always hoped that we could share in the joy of being on the water one day. Now we never will.”

“Kris, he’s dead but he’s not gone. Those two words do not mean the same thing. Every time you get on that deck and you lead those men, your father and your mother will be right beside you. As long as you keep loving them, they’ll never be gone.” Kris leaned forward and pressed his forehead to Yixing’s. “You said that you father lost his passion when you’re mother died. He’s got it back now.” Kris started crying again and Yixing just held him, occasionally repeating his earlier words when Kris seemed like he needed them.

When he was done crying, he took a deep breath and got out of the bed, slowly putting on his clothes and collecting himself. Then he walked out of the room and onto the deck to take care of his crew. Yixing got up and followed him out. The men were all staring at Kris’s cautiously, as if he were a ghost. Chen glanced at Yixing when he came out of the quarters and rushed over.

“If he’s out here, it means that he’s gonna be okay,” Chen said. Yixing nodded. Kris immediately ordered one of the men to give him their position and after that everyone returned to their work. They had too much respect for Kris to just stand and stare at him all day. Yixing walked up beside him on the upper deck, placing his hand on Kris’s arm. Kris turned to look at him and he nodded and Yixing knew that Kris was gonna be okay.

At least for now.

After two months at sea, the Wolf finally found her prey. Chanyeol spotted the eerie black sails far off into the distance. He immediately alerted the Captain who quickly announced that the ship would be entering battle preparations. Yixing looked to Kris, waiting to see what Kris wanted him to do. Once Kris was done giving all the orders he needed to, he grabbed Yixing and pulled him into the Captain’s cabin.

“Stay here,” Kris ordered. Yixing nodded quickly. He’d seen the Black Pearl’s final battle and it had looked absolutely terrifying to him. He wasn’t too keen on watching the ship’s attempt to annihilate one another. Kris pointed to the only door to his cabin. “If anyone but me or Chen opens that door, you get off the ship. Go as fast as you can and don’t look back.” Kris turned to leave and Yixing grabbed his arm.

“What about you? Promise me you’ll be safe.” Kris smiled.

“I don’t plan on letting this ship sink today.” Kris leaned forward and kissed Yixing which was completely contradictory to what he’d just said. Yixing pulled on his arm again but Kris broke free and left quickly. Yixing sat down underneath the big window, curled up, and prayed hard to the sea that she would keep them safe.

Kris however was barking orders to every sailor. The Sea Wolf had been through nearly two years of naval battles, but Kris still gave orders like it was the very first time. It would only take one mistake for the Wolf to sink to the bottom of the sea.

“Load all the cannons and wait for my signal. I want eyes on every section of that ship. Everyone have your swords close by your side.” Kris pulled Chen aside from all the madness. “Chen, you know that if anything happens--”

“Yes, Captain. I’ll protect Yixing with my life and I will ensure that he gets off this ship.” Kris nodded. “Tell them to raise the naval flag.” Chen nodded before he rushed off to take care of his duties during the attack. He would be Kris’s eyes on deck, making sure the machine-like operations continued smoothly without a single slip up.

As Kris had expected, the pirates refused to surrender. Kris made sure that the first cannon to go off was theirs. It barely hit the ship, instead clipping the very tip of bow. That was enough of a morale for the pirates that they continued sailing towards the Wolf, Kris ordered the ship to ride perpendicular to the pirates which would keep them from even getting the chance to board. The ship began making their turn when one of the cannons from the enemy ship sailed over the deck, barely missing it.

“Fire,” Kris ordered once again. The Wolf fired a second cannon, then a third, and a fourth in rapid succession. The Wolf had six cannons on each side of the ship that could moved so that the Wolf had twelve rotating cannons at her disposal, ensuring that she would never need to stop firing. It was this design, suggested by Kris, that had given the ship all of her victories. Both the third and fourth cannonball hit the pirate ship's hull and then the mast, and Kris knew that was a good sign but he couldn’t celebrate now.

The next cannon from the pirate ship was better than the first, hitting the back end of the quarterdeck, shattering the railing and send wood debris in all directions. Kris tried to dive out of the way so he wouldn’t get impaled and he hit the floor with a painful thud. He tried moving and instantly felt a searing pain in his arm. He looked down and saw that his coat was quickly turning red, a hand size piece of wood sticking out of his arm just below his shoulder. Kris screamed as he tried to get to his feet and in the very next second a crew member was supporting him.

“Keep firing,” Kris yelled as he was carried to the deck. The man was clearly trying to get him to his room, but Kris fought him to a standstill. A Captain remained on the deck until the battle was over. The next cannon that the Wolf fired was the decisive one in the battle. It hit the hull just above the waterline, blasting a huge hole into the ship that quickly began filling with water. The next cannon hit just diagonal of that one, ensuring that the ship would fill quickly with water. Pirates could be seen abandoning ship and Kris ordered the Wolf to get closer so that they could board the sinking ship and arrest anyone still on board. At the end of the battle, the Wolf had fifteen wanted pirates below deck in her cells.

Kris was trying to conduct the damage control on the Wolf’s destroyed back railing when Chen grabbed his good arm. “Captain, I can handle this. Let Suho wrap that before it gets infected or you bleed to death.” Kris tried to use his authority to protest but Chen wasn’t hearing any of it. He ordered their on board doctor Suho to take care of Kris and he personally escorted Kris to his cabin.

Yixing was sitting under the window, hiding his head between his knees. When the door opened, Yixing jumped up. He started taking several steps towards Kris before he noticed the blood soaked jacket. He gasped and immediately ran over to help Kris to his bed. Suho immediately set up his materials and got to work.

“Hold his hand,” Suho told Yixing. Yixing raised a confused eyebrow but he did as he was told. Kris tensed his jaw, knowing what was gonna happen next. Suho wrapped his hand around the wooden chunk protruding from Kris’s arm and yanked it out without giving Kris any time to prepare. Kris screamed and nearly crushed Yixing’s hand. Kris yelled out in pain as Suho stripped him out of his jacket and shirt, laying him down so he could stitch up the wound.

“I heard the crash and felt the ship shake,” Yixing said, squeezing Kris’s hand. He screamed again as Suho poured alcohol over the wound. “I got so terrified that something had happened to you and I prayed to the sea over and over again.” Kris kept his eyes focused on Yixing and Suho thought that maybe it was helping Kris’s pain to place all his focus on Yixing.

“This is nothing,” Kris said, flinching immediately after as Suho ran the needle through his skin for the first time. Yixing reached out his free hand and cupped Kris’s face.

“I realized that I don’t want to lose you ever but especially not before I get to experience every single thing that I can with you.” Yixing glanced over to where Suho was looping the thread and putting it through the skin a second time. “As soon as your arm is healed, I want us to do what you suggested earlier.”

“What are you talking about? Ow.” Kris squeezed his eyes shut and as he fought back the pain. Yixing glanced at Suho who was trying not to make is so obvious that he was there. Of course he would hear everything they said. There was no way that he could avoid it, but Yixing’s talking was helping Kris so Suho didn’t want to draw attention to himself.

“I wanna do to you what you do to me,” Yixing said, repeating the words that Kris had used when he’d asked that question weeks ago. Kris’s eyes snapped open and he looked at Yixing with wide eyes. He tried to sit up and he hissed in pain. Suho grabbed his good shoulder and forced Kris flat on his back.

“You do?” Kris asked with a stupid smile on his face. Yixing blushed and glanced at Suho, who seemed kind of embarrassed to be hearing this conversation. It wasn’t hard to guess what the two were talking about. Yixing smiled and nodded.

“I do. I want to do that.” Kris beckoned Yixing to lean forward and kiss him. Yixing did though Suho didn’t let their kiss last long. He finished the last loop of the stitch before he poured more alcohol over the wound. Finally he wrapped it in cloth and deemed Kris’s battle wound not lethal. After giving Kris instructions on how to keep the wound closed, such as no sleeping on that side and no strenuous activities, Suho left the two alone.

“We sunk that pirate ship and captured prisoners so we’ll be heading straight for port.” Kris reached up and brushed aside Yixing’s hair. “My arm should be good by then. We’ll probably be docked there for a few days so maybe you and I can have some real alone time.” Yixing grabbed Kris’s hand on his cheek and squeezed it.

“I’d like that. Can we maybe go on land?” Kris raised an eyebrow. The closest port, the one they would most likely dock at, was the very port where Minseok had picked up and where Kris lost his virginity to Tao. It was one of the biggest ports and Kris’s life seemed to revolve around it.

“We can rent a room in a nice Inn and we wouldn’t have to leave for days.” Yixing laid his head on Kris chest. Kris saw him worrying his lip and just waited patiently for Yixing to say whatever it is that he really wanted to.

“I want to see where your mother is buried,” Yixing said. Kris was at a loss for words. He was expecting Yixing to ask to do some specific thing, but he had expected to take the merman shopping or to animals or something. Not that.

“Why?”

“I wanted to thank her,” Yixing said. “For gifting the world with you.”

“I haven’t been back there in years, Yixing. Not since I left for sea myself.” Yixing glanced up at Kris and nodded.

“Then I definitely think we should go.” Kris didn’t say anything. Instead he just laid there, curious as to what it would feel like to see his mother’s grave after all these years, after losing his father too. It was the last thing on Earth that he wanted to do. Yixing must have seen the reluctance on his face because Yixing reached out, grabbed Kris’s hand, and refused to let it go for the rest of the night.

Yixing was glued to the ship’s railing as they grew closer to the port. Kris actually worried that he was gonna fall overboard because Yixing was leaning so far over the railing when they docked. He turned to Kris excitedly when they placed the planked walkway between the pier and the ship. Kris walked over to escort Yixing and Yixing could barely stand still. They made their way off the ship and down the pier and Kris had to stop Yixing from bending over to feel the dry, hard dirt that made up the street.

“Yixing, you have to blend in or it might be obvious that you aren’t from around here.” Yixing blushed a bright red before he grabbed onto Kris’s uninjured arm. It had been two weeks since their naval battle and Kris’s arm was mostly healed, though it still hurt him whenever he tried to lift something or raised his arm too high. It certainly wasn’t ideal for what Kris actually planned on doing while they were on land, but he would make do.

“So what’s first?” Yixing asked.

“It actually sounds like you want to be on land, surrounded by a bunch of humans.” Yixing looked down at his feet.

“Only with you. I couldn’t do this alone.” Kris smiled before smoothed back Yixing’s hair.

“Well first let’s go grab us a room for tonight. Afterwards this town has a really nice market with a bunch of fresh fish and fruit, and I think you’ll really enjoy trying all the new food.” Yixing nodded his head quickly, clearly very excited to try foods he’s never even heard of before.

They made their way to the hotel and Yixing stood back while Kris handled all the pricing and negotiations. The man seemed very reluctant to rent them a room because, judging by the look he kept tossing Yixing, the innkeeper must have thought Kris had purchased Yixing for sex. Kris tried to reassure the man that they were sailors, that Kris himself was a captain, and finally after Kris put a whole pouch full of money on the counter, the man finally sold them a room.

Yixing couldn’t stop himself from sitting down the bed in the room. It certainly wasn’t a room fit for a king but it had more cushion than his bed on the ship did. Yixing spread out on the bed and Kris smiled at him. Eventually Kris walked over and laid down on the bed beside Yixing. Yixing leaned over and kissed him and all too soon, neither of them had any intention of getting out of that bed. The market looked better at night anyway.

“What is this?” Yixing asked. He was looking at plums and running his fingers over the skin of the fruit. Kris smiled and bought one for them to share. Kris took the first bite out of it before he handed it over to Yixing, who sank his teeth into it. His face immediately scrunched up and he turned to Kris. “It’s sweet,” he said with a smile. He took another bite and the juice dripped down his chin. Kris took a deep breath and Yixing wiped at his mouth when he caught Kris staring. Maybe he should keep Yixing away from the juicy fruits because he wasn’t sure he could resist the urge to jump Yixing there in the market.

Yixing wanted to try all the different fruits that he could and Kris didn’t even bother trying to deny him what he wanted. When they got into the section of the market that sold goods like fabric and jewelry, Yixing was smiling at everything. Kris just watched as Yixing fingered jewels and gold and silk. He’d most likely never experienced what any of those objects looked or felt like, and Kris enjoyed seeing the wonder on Yixing’s face.

While Yixing was listening to a merchant explain where he’d gotten a beautiful sapphire necklace, Kris looked around the market. Kris smiled wide to himself when he noticed something that hadn’t been there before. When they had passed the apples stand earlier, there had just been one man, the vendor. Now there were two men standing at the apple stand, one slightly taller than the other and recognizable by his unique face.

Tao was laughing at what the other man said, and Kris could easily guess that the other man was Sehun, the apple merchant who had long ago treated Tao like a human before a whore. The fact that Tao was standing in the market in simple clothing with a radiant smile covering his whole face meant that he had saved up enough money to pay off his debt. Kris thought about going over to tell Tao hello, but he didn’t want to ruin their little world full of happiness by showing up as someone from Tao’s past. Instead he smiled one more time before he turned back to Yixing just in time for Yixing to ask Kris to buy a gold bracelet.

Yixing kept turning his hand over and over so he could watch the bracelet sparkle. Kris was actually smiling because seeing Yixing happy was the only thing in the world that Kris needed to be happy himself.  However, Kris put on a faux frown when Yixing looked at him, seeming guilty for only having eyes for his new bracelet. Yixing bit his lip and blushed and Kris’s frown turned into a playful pout, one to let Yixing know that he wasn’t really upset.

“Sorry,” Yixing said. Kris smiled and beckoned Yixing over to him. Yixing got up off the bed and made his way over to sit on Kris’s lap. Kris ran his hands up Yixing’s thighs before dragging them back towards him slowly. Yixing rearranged himself so he was straddling Kris, who merely smiled at him. Yixing grabbed Kris’s collar and ran the fabric between his fingers. “Our people don’t wear jewelry. It corrodes too easily under the water.”

“Good thing you aren’t under water anymore because I want to cover you in beautiful gems.” Yixing didn’t smile the way Kris was expecting him too. Instead he leaned over and kissed Kris, pulling Kris into it by the collar. Kris’s hands ran up Yixing’s sides and then onto his back, gripping him tightly in return.

“Is your shoulder well enough?” Yixing asked in between kisses when his mouth was still no more than a few inches away from Kris. Kris nodded without even hearing the question because he wanted so desperately for them to get to the sex. Yixing seemed to see through Kris’s false answer and he pulled back to ask the question again. This time Kris answered him honestly that yes his shoulder was well enough. Kris suggested they move to the bed, but Yixing refused to move. “I’ve never done this before,” Yixing said, voicing the obvious.

“It’s more instinct than thought,” Kris said. He was getting uncomfortably aroused just by hearing the innocent and excited tone in Yixing’s voice. “You know everything you have to do.” Kris reached up and ran his fingers down Yixing’s cheek to his jaw. “Start with your fingers and when I tell you that I’m ready, then you move on.”

“Promise me that you’ll tell me if you aren’t enjoying it,” Yixing said. Kris grabbed onto Yixing’s chin, running his thumb over the other’s lip.

“How can that even happen?” Kris said with a smile. “I’ve wanted to feel you inside me for a while now.” Yixing didn’t even blush when he heard that. He merely nodded to himself before he crushed their lips together.It wasn’t long after the kissing began that the two had made their way to the bed, where they stripped down without so much as separating their mouths. Finally Yixing decided to follow his instinct which led his mouth down to Kris’s neck, leaving Kris panting. As Yixing lost himself more and more to instinct, Kris lost himself more and more to pleasure, to Yixing. When Yixing finally entered him, Kris felt like he wasn't himself, they weren't themselves.

Yixing wasn’t a merman out of water, loving a man who was flesh and earth. Kris didn’t feel like a sailor who had spent his whole life searching for a sea that he could love. In those minutes they weren’t two separate entities who had been brought together by the chance of waves and net, they were one, the perfect collaboration of land and sea.

“You’re beautiful,” Kris whispered. Yixing looked at him through sweat soaked bangs. It wasn’t like he had never heard Kris call him beautiful before. Kris did it all the time, when he was sleeping or eating or smiling. But something in his tone felt different. Almost as if Kris was saying it not with the intent to please and assure Yixing, but as if he were trying to label the moment in time by those words alone.

Kris guided Yixing’s hand over his own cock until Kris came with a hard shudder, shortly after feeling the skin of Yixing’s hand on that part of his body for the first time. Yixing came right behind him, before removing himself from Kris’s body. Yixing tried to lay down beside Kris, but Kris pulled the smaller man down on top of him. They were hot, sweaty, and dirty but Kris desired that post sex intimacy and Yixing wouldn’t deny him that.

“I told you that I’d enjoy it,” Kris said, as his breath finally evened out. Kris brushed back Yixing’s clumped together, sweaty hair and Yixing pushed his hand away playfully. Kris smiled and kissed Yixing before the smaller man got up to get a towel to clean Kris off in the way that Kris always did for him. In the end, Kris refused to let Yixing clean him off and so Yixing picked up a shirt and put it on, putting all of the buttons but the top two.

“You know, Yixing,” Kris said once he had cleaned himself up, “putting on my shirt is gonna make me want to go for round two.” Yixing glanced down at the oversized shirt that practically swallowed him whole before he smiled. He made his back to the bed and laid down beside Kris. Kris laid down beside him, immediately intertwining his fingers with Yixing. They both just laid there, not saying anything for a while. They just looked at each other, smiling, occasionally caressing or stroking each other’s hair or arms.

“I still wanna visit your mother’s grave,” Yixing said after a while. Kris sighed and placed Yixing’s hand over his heart, gripping it tightly.

“I don’t know if I can do that, Yixing. After what happened with my father, I don’t think I can face both my parents death at the same time.”

“Dead does not mean gone,” Yixing said, repeating his previous words to Kris. “They are still part of our lives. We should never just try and forget about someone just because they’ve left this world.” Kris didn’t say anything. He just kept his eyes unfocused on the bedsheets. Yixing squeezed his hand. “I’ll be with you, so you don’t have to fight to be so strong. If you cry, that’s okay. If you decide that you can’t do it, then we can go. But I want to meet her. I have to thank her.”

“Why can’t you just be happy with me running from my problems?” Kris asked, though his tone was playful and loving and not angry. He’d meant it as a way of saying that he would take them to his mother’s grave, but Yixing frowned and opened his mouth to say something though he ended up snapping it shut. Kris raised an eyebrow and waited for Yixing to explain. An explanation never came. “I was just joking, Yixing.”

“Just don’t run from your problems,” Yixing said. Kris’s eyebrows pulled down and he tried to meet Yixing’s eyes, which kept looking at his chest rather than his face. “Running only makes things so much worse,” Yixing said before he rolled over to face away from Kris. Kris was at a loss. Yixing words didn’t seem to be aimed at him at all. Rather they seemed to be for Yixing himself, as if he were scolding himself for doing exactly the opposite.

Kris set up a carriage the next morning to take them to his hometown, where his mother was buried. They would be gone for two days and Kris alerted Chen so he could handle the preparations for them to return to sea before Kris got back. Kris was still on edge the whole carriage ride and he kept stealing glances at Yixing, who was smiling as he looked outside the window. Yixing hadn’t said another thing about running from mistakes and he was mostly quiet for the remainder of the night. They’d made love another time though this time Kris was inside Yixing, pleasing the other man until they were both so exhausted that they both went straight to sleep afterwards.

When the carriage rounded a familiar bend along the coast, Kris’s stomach tightened. He hadn’t been home since he left and knowing that he literally had nothing there ensured that he would never want to. Yixing turned to him once they were riding parallel to the water and smiled. Kris groaned because he just knew that he would be overwhelmed with emotion the moment he saw his mother’s grave. It’s not that he cared about crying in front of Yixing. It was that he didn’t want to go through all the emotions usually associated with crying.

“It’ll be okay,” Yixing said, grabbing Kris’s hand. Kris shrugged and brought Yixing’s hand to his lips, kissing the knuckles and digits in an attempt to ready himself. Yixing seemed so unphased by it all. He wasn’t scared of the challenge that Kris facing his past would bring. THe heavy and sad emotions didn’t scare Yixing away, and Kris fell head over heels in love with that bravery.

Finally the carriage came to a stop in the middle of the small village. Kris ordered the man to stay close to the village because they intended to leave early the next morning. Kris opened the door and got out, holding his hand out for Yixing to grab hold of. The people in the village, mostly kids and the elderly at that time of the day, were all staring wide eyed at the carriage. Kris was aware that his naval jacket was probably extravagant compared to the tattered rags that the townspeople wore.

Yixing got out of the carriage and smiled, first at Kris, and then at the crowd of people around them. The folks seemed calmed by that and they all smiled and waved back at them. Kris smiled at Yixing and began walking him towards the outer edge of the village, where the small graveyard was. The town was so close to the water that burying bodies was a hard feat and could only be done about half a mile outside of the town.

They were silent along the way but Kris wasn’t oblivious to the reassuring glances Yixing kept giving him. He just squeezed Yixing’s hand tighter and tighter. He could do this. He could face this reality so long as Yixing was by him. He could solve anything with Yixing there to be his strength.

They stopped outside the graveyard. It had no formal entryway. The town was too small and poor for that. It merely had the trail that continued to run through the middle of it and about forty head stones for those who died on land. Most of the inhabitants were fisherman and they either died at sea or chose to be sent there after their death. The graveyard was for wives and mothers and daughters.

“I’m here,” Yixing whispered as he squeezed Kris’s hand. He turned to Kris and wrapped the taller man in his arms. “I’m here.” Kris felt tears in his eyes, but he didn’t let them god yet. He merely nodded his head and pulled away from Yixing. Then with a deep breath, he went into the graveyard.

His mother’s grave was the fourth one on the fifth row and his feet seemed to drag on the ground as he made his way forward. Ween he was in front of the grave, he let of Yixing’s hand and turned away from the sight. His breathing was getting shallow and his vision was getting blurry. He took a shaky breath and turned around, the air stopping in his throat almost immediately.

Yixing was kneeling in front of the grave, his legs tucked under him and his hands folded in his lap. He was staring down at the grave and it looked as if he was saying something. Kris shook his head and listened to what Yixing was saying.

“He grew up to be the finest man, and I know for a fact that you’re proud of him.” Kris’s eyes burned and his jaw began to quiver as he failed to hold back his tears. “He’s told me so much about you and I’m certain that all of the qualities that make me love him are the ones he got from you. You would love how tall and caring he is. I’m very thankful for you. Without your love and tenderness, without your acceptance of his lover for the sea, I would never have met him.” Yixing bowed over. “I am grateful to you, truly.”

Kris not so gracefully fell to his knees beside Yixing. Yixing turned to look at him and Kris nearly fell on top of the other man as he hugged him. Kris was crying hard into Yixing’s shoulder and Yixing merely clutched him back tightly. He didn’t say a word because he’d exhausted all the reassuring phrases he had and he didn’t want to make Kris feel anymore pitied. Therefore, Kris was left to himself, bawling and shaking as he cried over something that Yixing felt he had never faced since he had been a boy.

When Kris stopped crying, he set back and looked at his mother’s grave. “Mom,” he whispered. “If you and Dad are there, smiling, I want you guys to know that I love you.” He wiped at his eyes and Yixing just watched him. “I had always hoped you guys would get to meet the love of my life. His name is Yixing and I know that both of you would have loved him. I love him.”

“Thank you,” Yixing said, perhaps both to Kris and his parents.

“Thank you,” Kris copied. Yixing bowed one more time and then they both stood up to leave. Kris said what Yixing believed to be his final farewell to the grave site before they started walking back to town. The sun had dropped quite low while they were in the graveyard and the sky was quickly fading into darkness on their walk back. Neither of them talked, much like the way to the graveyard, though this time the air was a tad lighter. Kris wasn’t feeling impending dread and Yixing believed he had also finally put his parents to rest.

Two days later and they were back at sea. Kris returned back to his normal self, running the ship as normal and showering Yixing in affection as usual. Yixing could tell that Kris had left behind his sadness. It wasn’t that he wasn’t still mourning his parents. He would probably always mourn for his parents, but Kris had finally accepted that his parents were now together and that Yixing was right: his parents were dead but not gone.

Kris woke up a few nights after their return to sea because of two unusual factors. The first was that Yixing was not in bed with him. He woke up to an empty bed and his arms lying limply beside him, instead of wrapped around his lover like usual. The second thing was that Kris thought he heard someone crying. The soft, quiet sniffling of someone who was trying not to be heard. However, by the time he was conscious enough to understand what he was hearing, there were no more tears.

There was also no Yixing.

Kris jumped out of his bed and turned in clumsy circle as he tried to locate his lover. Yixing wasn’t anywhere in his cabin and Kris was about to make his way to the deck to check if Yixing was out there when he noticed for the first time that the room was cold. He’d been so panicked and worried that he hadn’t even noticed the window was open. Kris made his way over there and tried to see if Yixing was in the water. It was too dark for him to see very much so Kris called out for him.

For several long seconds, there was nothing. Kris didn’t hear anyone call back to him. He didn’t hear any disruptions of the water’s surface to suggest that Yixing was coming out of the water. Kris didn’t see pale skin shining out against the blackness. Kris felt like the whole world was moving incredibly slow and all of his senses were straining to locate Yixing.

“Kris,” Yixing’s soft voice floated up from the water. Kris exhaled and it was so loud that he could actually hear it over the water splashing against the side of the ship. Kris squinted his eyes and finally Yixing appeared in the light from his bedchamber.

“You had me so worried,” Kris said. He waited only a second more before he climbed over the edge and jumped into the water. The water was freezing cold and Kris shivered the second he was completely enveloped in it. He let himself sink a tiny bit before he made a flip and swam to the surface.

Yixing was right there waiting for him when he broke the water’s tranquility. He was smiling apologetically, clearly feeling guilty over making Kris worry. Kris smiled too to show Yixing that wasn’t angry but relieved. He reached out his hand and grabbed Yixing’s face, holding the younger man in place so he could kiss him. Whenever they kissed like this is tended to be more messy since Yixing had extra long teeth to account for, but it was also more heavy. If Yixing’s regular kissed made him feel like he was drowning, then these kisses made him feel like he was sunk at the bottom of the ocean, without even the light from the sun to guide him to the top.

“Sorry,” Yixing whispered when Kris pulled back. “I just wanted to swim.” Kris felt one of the fins of Yixing’s tail swipe along the length of his leg and it made him jump a little. Yixing laughed and Kris playfully pushed him.

“I wish you would have told me. I woke up and you weren’t there.” Yixing reached up and ran a hand through Kris’s hair.

“I’d never leave you like that.” Kris grabbed Yixing’s hand and brought it to his cheek. Yixing titled his head to the side and smile affectionately, causing the ethereal sheen of his skin to catch the light from the moon and illuminate. Kris thought Yixing was always beautiful but he was otherworldly when he was in the water, in his element.

Yixing pulled away from him, turned around, and dove into the water, his tail causing a big splash on the surface. Kris smiled and dove in after him. Their hands joined together, knuckles crashing together, and Kris tried to keep up with Yixing under the water. Kris couldn’t open his eyes--he’d be blind even if he could with how dark the water was--but he could imagine how Yixing looked. His tail would be slicing through the water, his fins flared out and swirling around as he corkscrewed through the water.

They swam until Kris’s lungs burned for air and he tugged on Yixing’s hand. Normally it would have taken him several long seconds of fighting the urge to gasp for air to make it to the surface. However, with Yixing as his aqueous guide, Kris was breathing air almost as soon as he pulled on Yixing’s hand.

“Sorry. I guess I forgot that you need air.” Kris shook his head.

“I enjoy getting to swim with you.” Yixing opened his mouth to say something but he didn’t get the chance because Kris shivered, causing him to splash some water on Yixing. Yixing immediately started laughing and Kris was quick to follow him. “I supposed I better get out of the water before I get sick. You going to stay out here a while?”

"Just a bit," Yixing said. Kris playfully told him to come to bed and keep him warm, but Kris swam back to the ship and started climbing up the ladder to his window. He looked back over his shoulder and saw that the water was completely still, Yixing probably already feet below the surface. Kris smiled to himself before he crawled into his room, shivering almost violently.

Kris was in the warm of his bed within seconds and he was back asleep within minutes. However, he woke up an hour later when he felt cold arms wrap around him. Kris nearly jumped up and he felt Yixing's laugh reverberate through him.

"Sorry," he whispered. Kris grabbed Yixing's hands between his own and tried to warm them up. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's okay. I can't sleep well without you anyway." Yixing smirked and cuddle his still cold body against Kris, who embraced him with nearly a bruising pressure.

"Thank you, Kris."

"For what?" Kris asked, perplexed as to what he did to deserve thanks.

"Just for everything. For saving my life. For loving me despite all the trouble. For being patient and gentle with me. I would never have gotten to experience all of the most wonderful things in my life without you. I just wanted to say thanks for all of the experiences you've given me."

"Yixing," Kris whispered, turning so he could see the merman's face. "That sounds a lot like a goodbye."

"No," Yixing said. "I'm just thankful." Kris continued to watch Yixing though Yixing just smiled at him like he thought Kris was being ridiculous. It was at that second that Kris remembered the sound that woke him up.

"Yixing, were you crying earlier?" Yixing shook his head.

"No." Kris looked at Yixing, trying to tell if Yixing was lying to him. He had answered very fast and didn't seem confused by the question. In the end, Kris had no reason to doubt that Yixing would start lying to him now.

"I guess I had imagined it," Kris said, cuddling up to Yixing once more. Yixing let the smile fall from his face when he knew Kris wasn’t looking at him anymore. The next time Yixing’s emotions became uncontrollable, he’d be sure to cry in a place where no one could hear him.

“I can’t believe,” Kris whispered as his rested one hand on Yixing’s waist, “that we’re already on our way back to land. We’ve only been gone for a few weeks.” Yixing reached down and grabbed onto Kris’s hand, pulling his lover’s arm tighter around him. They were standing on deck and it was the most beautiful day since Yixing had been on the Wolf.

“Already that long?” Yixing asked. “The new moon should be coming up soon, right?” Kris seemed to think about before he nodded.

“Tonight.”

Yixing immediately went still and he turned to Kris with a horrific look on his face.

“Tonight?” he asked. Kris stared at him, equally horrified.

“Yixing, what’s wrong?” Yixing put his hand over his mouth. Kris immediately grabbed onto  Yixing’s shoulders and asked Yixing again and again to explain what was wrong.

“I’m so sorry,” Yixing choked out, his eyes already filling with tears. Kris was about to ask again when Yixing immediately stepped out of Kris’s grasp. Kris reached for him but Yixing merely backed away further before he turned and bolted towards Kris’s quarters. Kris merely stared at the space where Yixing had been.

“Captain?” Chen called from the deck, eyes wide after watching Yixing run across the deck, tears falling from his eyes.

“Keep an eye on things for me,” Kris called out before he ran after Yixing. He found Yixing curled up underneath the bay window, sobbing so hard his whole body was shaking. It reminded Kris of the first time he’d ever met Yixing tied up below deck on that merchant ship. Kris closed the door behind him and Yixing immediately started crying even harder.

“I’m so sorry,” Yixing cried out. “I’m so so so sorry. I should have just been honest.”

“About what? Yixing, tell me what’s going on.”

“I’ve lied to you. About everything, from the second I step foot on this boat. I never meant to but you asked me if I was going to stay and I couldn’t tell you no.” Kris felt his throat close and all air left his lungs. He laid back against the door and put his hands against the wood to keep himself from falling down.

“What does that mean?” Kris asked. Yixing finally looked at him.

“I was never supposed to stay this long. I was never supposed to come at all, but I couldn’t just accept the fact that I might have never seen you again, not after what happened on that beach. I only planned for one night, but you asked me to stay and I wanted to pretend just a little bit longer.”

“Are you leaving me?” Kris choked out as tears fell from his eyes, over his cheeks and to the corner of his mouth. Yixing stayed quite, taking in shaky breaths  around his sobs. Kris slammed his fist into the door. “I still have one more question remember? So answer me, dammit. Are you leaving?”

“I don’t know,” Yixing shouted.

“You don’t know?” Kris wiped at his eyes. “Please help me, Yixing, because I don’t understand.” Yixing tried to stand up but he couldn’t quite find the strength in his legs. So he leaned against the window sill, facing Kris.

“I once told you that our people are ruled by a king. Do you remember?” Kris nodded. “A beloved and cherished position, the king is the backbone of our people. He decides where our people will god in the future and what paths we will take.” Yixing took a very deep breathe. “Seven months ago, our king died, leaving behind no heir to take the throne after him.”

“What does that have to do with you?” Kris asked, trying to get control of his breathing.

“Because he left no heir, our Elders had to choose the person who would be our next ruler.” Kris’s eyes went wide.

“They chose you?”

“Not exactly. They chose four or five candidates and put them through tests. After all the tests are complete, then they chose the next monarch. I was just one of the candidates. I went through all the tests and on the day that we were going to find out who would be king, I found your message in a bottle.”  Yixing choked on a sob and looked away as more tears fell from his eyes. “I was only supposed to come for a night and then god back the next day to find out if I was a king, but I couldn’t. I just couldn’t leave after that.”

“Yixing-”

“But I can’t stay any longer. That night when you came looking for me and you found me in the water, I wasn’t swimming. Luhan came looking for me. After I disappeared, they waited to make the announcement. They won’t wait anymore. I either go back now or I forfeit my chance of being king.”

Kris wanted to be angry. Angry that Yixing had lied to him. Angry that Yixing seemed to want to go back over stay with him. But Kris couldn’t be, not when he saw the pain in Yixing’s eyes over having to make this choice.

“Do you really want to be king?” Kris asked. Yixing looked at him and nodded very slowly.

“I want to do the very best for my people. I believe that I can do so much for them and I want to.” Kris nodded to himself before he wiped at his eyes. He pushed off the door and made his way over to Yixing. He slid down onto the ground beside him and pulled Yixing to his chest. Yixing finally broke down again, crying hard, and Kris just held him as his tears slid silently down his cheeks.

“You’ll be a wonderful king,” Kris said. “Always kind and optimistic. They’ll be so lucky to have you.” Kris leaned his head against the wall, hoping it would help him clear his airways so he could breathe around his closed throat.

“They may not choose me,” Yixing said once he couldn’t cry anymore.

“What will you do then?”

“”Come back to you. I wish I could have both and I kept running, hoping that they would just choose a king so I wouldn't have to make this decision. I love you so much, Kris, and the only thing I will ever want is you. But my people need me and I have to keep my people from living in fear under the water. I’m the only one who can help us move forward.”

“I can’t spend everyday of my life waiting to find out if you’re going to come back. I need a definite answer from you. I want you to come back to me, but I can’t wait for you like that, Yixing. How will I know if I’m giving you up for good or not?”

“I’m sure that they’ll make the announcement as soon as I return. If I don’t come back by tomorrow night, then I won’t be coming back at all. If I’m king, I will never be able to leave our city. It’ll be my duty to care for us and ensure that we keep surviving. I’ll have to have an heir and a mate. Being king, will mean goodbye for us.”

“That’s what you want?” Kris asked. Yixing nodded slowly. “Then how can I mourn that. You’ll be happy and living in your home, where you’ve always belonged. It’s really no different than me being a captain on this ship. I couldn’t just give it up and I don’t want you to sacrifice this opportunity for me.” Yixing reached up and grabbed Kris’s cheeks before kissing him. His lips tasted like salt and sadness and goodbyes.

“Make love to me,” Yixing whispered. Kris shook his head slowly.

“I can’t.” Yixing opened his eyes wide. “I can’t hold you and love you while knowing that it’ll probably be the last time. I think that actually might kill me.” Yixing nodded in understanding, though he seemed hurt. Kris’s words weren’t meant to sound like he was dying as it was, but that was the truth and Kris just couldn’t do anything to make it worse.

“I have to leave. I promised Luhan when I saw him that I’d be home by the new moon.” Yixing and Kris stood up together, both supporting each other equally. Yixing was clinging onto Kris tightly, his chest burning with the need to cry until he was drowning in a pool of tears. Kris just continued to cry, his tears falling silently, one for every memory that he wouldn’t get to make with Yixing, one for every day that he wouldn’t get to wake by his lover’s side.

“I love you, Yixing.” Kris said and he squeezed Yixing tightly. “I’ve loved you from the first second my eyes ever saw you. Time and distance have never been able to dull my love for you and they never will.”

“I love you too,” Yixing whispered back. “I may live for hundreds of more years and my heart will always belong to you. Not a second will go by where I won’t be thinking about you, yearning for you, remembering what you feel like. No matter what. You will always be the love of my life, the one who helped me really live.”

Their lips connected and they kissed until both of them were light headed from lack of oxygen. Their kiss tasted of tears but neither of them stopped crying to kiss each other. Their cheeks just glistened with tear tracks as they committed their final kiss to memory, the taste and the feel of each other’s mouth burned into their brains and their hearts to never be forgotten.

“I’m so sorry,” Yixing whispered as he pulled back, big breaths between each word. Kris shook his head and stepped away from Yixing. If he continued holding the smaller man, he might just recant all the things he’d said earlier about willingly letting Yixing go. Yixing grabbed onto the window sill and turned away from Kris. He hopped up onto the sill and threw one leg over the side.

“Yixing?” Kris asked. Yixing stopped and glanced back at him. “Can you make me a promise?” Yixing nodded. “Meet me again, twenty years from now, on the beach where we first made love. Give me something to look forward to and agree to meet me. Please.”

“Nothing will keep me from it,” Yixing said. Kris nodded once and closed his eyes. Yixing understood that Kris couldn’t watch him leave, not this time, so he told Kris he loved him one more time before he turned and dove into the water. Kris flinched when he heard a loud splash and he hated the way he ran to the window, desperately searching for Yixing. The merman was nowhere to be found and Kris slammed the window shutter as he screamed in frustration.

Chen burst into the room seconds later, looking concerned, to find Kris crying and screaming on the ground. The men were all trying to look into the captain’s quarters. Chen quickly slammed the door shut and rushed over to Kris. He grabbed Kris in his arms as he Kris told him that Yixing was gone. Chen could barely understand him around the Captain’s sobs, so Chen just clutched the Captain to him, knowing that just the human touch would help to soothe him.

Kris cried for at least an hour and he told Chen to anchor the ship. They had to wait because there was a small chance that Yixing might be coming back. Chen sat with Kris until darkness fell on the following night, stealing all light from Kris’s world. Chen asked him if they should continue to wait, but Kris shook his head.

“He’s not coming,” Kris whispered. He stood up and said a silent prayer to the sea that she would keep him alive long enough for him to meet Yixing on that beach. If she could keep him alive till then, he would be completely hers afterwards.


	4. Ebb (Twenty Years Later)

Chen finally let go of Kris and stepped away from him. He looked around the small island, clearly worried that Kris had some screws loose. Kris smiled and reassured him once again that he was making this decision with a sane mind.

“Captain--”

“Chen, I’m not the Captain anymore. The Wolf is yours now. You’re her Captain and I expect you to take good care of her in my place.” Kris and Chen both looked at the large naval ship out to sea a few miles off shore. Chen and Kris had rowed onto the beach in one small boat together. Chen had insisted they take two so Kris could leave later. But Kris wasn’t going to need one so he made Chen leave it with the Wolf.

“You’ll always be my Captain.”

“I knew you’d be a good successor the second I met you.” Chen saluted him and Kris saluted him back. Then Chan grabbed him into a bruising hug, tears sparkling in his eyes. For over twenty years, Kris had been his best friend, and even more at one point, and he would miss him.

Finally Kris gave Chen his last order as Captain for Chen to leave the island. Chen did quietly, wiping at his eyes. Kris watched him go with a smile before he sat down in the sand, waiting for his long ago lover to show up.

He nearly didn’t recognize Yixing when his head appeared above the water. His hair was much darker than Kris remembered it being and it was passed his shoulders in length. Upon his head sat a voluminous and full crown made of pearls and shells. Aside from those features, he looked exactly the same.

Unlike Kris whose body had changed quite a lot in the past twenty years. His face was showing his age with deep wrinkles around his eyes and mouth. His hair was peppered with gray in some areas. His skin was dark and leathery from all of his time in the sun. Yixing looked like he was barely twenty and Kris looked like his age, a man middle-aged.

Kris smiled and stood up as Yixing shifted forms and walked onto the sand. Yixing looked over his shoulder and Kris saw two other forms waiting in the water, just away from the shore. Yixing shouted something in his native tongue, an odd language Kris had never heard even from Yixing before. The two figures nodded reluctantly and then disappeared under the surface.

“We can be alone now,” Yixing said as he turned back to Kris.

“You look beautiful.” Yixing’s cheeks shined red and he smiled.

“I haven’t had anyone call me beautiful in a very long time,” Yixing said, almost shyly. Kris closed the gap between them in seconds and crushed Yixing in an embrace. Yixing’s hands were wrapped around him in seconds and he felt Yixing’s breath on his neck. It made him shiver with memories.

“I’ve missed you,” Kris whispered. Yixing merely nodded. “I love you so much.”

“Me too,” Yixing said, leaning back so he could look into Kris’s face. “I love you too.”

Their kiss was memorable, because it was clumsy and slow. It was the product of two people just trying to reconnect, trying to recreate all the passion and romance they once had. Yixing tasted like the water and Kris had to admit that it wasn’t something he hated. After the kiss ended, they both sat down in the sand, with Yixing leaning against Kris. It was a lot like when they were stranded on the island.

“How long can you stay?” Kris asked.

“Not long unfortunately.” Yixing glanced at Kris and bit his lip, as if he had something he wanted to say but felt he couldn’t. Kris noticed and asked Yixing not to hold any piece of information from him, so Yixing took a deep breath and told Kris the wonderful news. “I’ll be expecting my first child any day now so my queen and I are quite busy.”

“That’s wonderful,” Kris said, feeling truly happy. Yixing nodded.

“I’m really excited,” Yixing said. “I’ve already talked it over with her and I want to name my son after you.”

“What?” Kris asked, staring at Yixing in surprise.

“I want him to be named Kris, after you.”

“Yixing, that’s a little weird. Naming your son after your lover. How does your wife feel about that?”

“She approves,” Yixing said. “We believe that a name with many good memories will lead to a good future. No name has better memories for me. You helped me live and I hope the name will help him to live.”

“Thank you,” Kris said, for lack of a proper response.

“Did you have any kids?” Yixing asked. Kris merely shook his head. “Did you ever even take another lover?” Kris didn’t think that Yixing really wanted to know the answer, but he had had asked Yixing for honest. Which meant he had to give it as well.

“Yeah,” Kris said. “For a year or two, Chen and I were lovers. It was never serious, just casual sex to relieve our frustrations while at sea. Besides,” Kris said, guilt coming over his features, “Chen looks a lot like you from behind.”

“I haven’t let anyone take me. I want you to be the only one who's ever done that.” Kris nodded.

“You seem happy,” Kris said, reaching out to grab Yixing’s hand.

“I am.” Yixing sat up and looked at Kris. “But I would be much happier if I could have you too.”

“What if you can?” Kris asked. Yixing looked confused so Kris continued. “Yixing, I never intended to leave this island. I decided twenty years ago that I was not going to let you walk out of my life again.”

“Kris, what are you saying?” Kris turned to Yixing and grabbed both of his hands between his own.

“Take me back with you. Drag me beneath the waves. I may not have been born like you but the sea has always been my home, Yixing. Take me home.”

“You’ll die,” Yixing whispered.

“Dead, Yixing, but not gone. This is what I want. Bury me under the water where I can rest peacefully where I belong.” Yixing looked back at the water before he turned back to Kris.

“There is this calm spot between these two reefs just outside my palace that would be perfect for you. It’s a spot full of life and it’s beautiful. I could stop by everyday and talk to you. You could see my kids and you’d never be far from me.” Kris kissed Yixing’s hands.

“Not far at all,” he said. “I can’t live another day without you. So let’s go home. Together.”

Yixing nodded and Kris couldn’t help the smile on his face. Some might have thought of their choice as morbid and sad, but as Yixing led Kris into deeper and deeper water, they were the happiest they’d ever been.

Because at long last, they were finally going to get to be together forever.

  
When Yixing died after years and years of a glorious reign, he was buried alongside his favorite spot between two reefs, a spot many people never knew the secret behind, a secret space for two lovers.


End file.
